days of ma freakin life

sick sick sick

2009-07-07T21:22:00.002+08:00

like finally sume1 updated her blog... i knw i knw....

its been very very very long since i update...
so here it is....

currently life suxs (as usual)... no big deal... its an evryday matter 4 me.....

things between me n ma father worsening.... its gonna soon get out of hand....

werk gettting worst too. oooppppssss... its nt the werk but its the ppl i werk with.... some of which the mouth is as big as a chicken asshole..... gossip n gossip non stop.

actualli i have tons n tons to update. will update it on sunday. as 4 nw i nd to go n reset al ma emails passwerd.... i have tons of mai. n i cant access to ma accS rite nw.... ARGHHHH!!!!! both ma yahoo n hotmai mails r nt werking..... it seems he passwerd is always wrung...... any1 care 2 hep me with this, since im not a PRO at all this.

SO COMPLICATED!!

2009-06-13T21:26:00.002+08:00

wassup peepz??? any1 leading a life like me???

but i guess i do really laughs these days.... n i have 2 admit ma life is way betta thn a life i use 2 lead...... i guess pppl arnd me is the reasons 4 a laughter...

but i do still shed tears..... i reaali dunno y??? sometimes i feel silly n weirdo but i realli cant help it.... wen i cry, da feeling is jus gr8.... yup gr8.... coz whenever i cry, i feel i have poured out all ma problms.... so thts y i love to cry....

im realli very desperate 4 anotha job.... seriously.... coz ma father realli dislike me werkin at ma uncle's shp 4 a lame reason, coz i gt tired very easily thr.... n i also wanna stp werkin thr, coz there's been a lot of tension between co-workers... dunt wanna realli elaborate..... I JUS WANNA WERK under healthcare.... y??? y???? until nw im still nt in luck 4 a job under healthcare.

nowadays have been realli gorging a lot... eat n eat non stop.... dunno y always get hungry??? so in the end of the day im nvr losing weight, im jus gonna keep on gaining weight n loads of it till i bcome a fat pig... OOOPPPPS!!! I AM A FAT PIG....

still gt days 2 go b4 the grand sleepover... so on the 19th till 22th.... im gonna b with ma kuzzies..... woohooo!!!! excited sehy..... loads of happening n silly stuff tht we r gonna do.... yeah!!! movie marathon, water bombs, carpark escapes, outings n cool stuffs.....GOSH!!! REALLI CANT WAIT!!!!

k ppeps, adiyos!!!!

WOOOOHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-04T20:28:00.002+08:00

OMG!!!! REALLI VERY SRY BOUT NT UPDATING..... REALLI HAVE 4GOTTEN BOUT THIS BLOG THINGY.....

NOW BAQ TO MA LIFE..... TIS DAYS, MA LIFE HAS BEEN UNDER CONTROL.... THANKS A ZILLION TO MA PATIENCE...... BUT DURING SOME DAYS, MA LIFE HAS SIMPLY BEEN HAYWIRE..... JUS TOO MANY HARD STUFFS TO HANDLE.... N IM CURRETLY NOW BECOMING A SCAPEGOAT IN MA WERKPLACE.....

FATHER:

NOW HE'S MORE GENTLE N OHK WITH ME.... N IM REALLI VERY HAPPY.... I DUNNO Y SUDDENLY 4 SOME REASONS HE HAS CHANGED.... IF IT IS A FACT THT MA MONEY HAS CHANGED HIM THN IM SAD.... BUT IF IT IS NOT, THN IM REALLI HAPPY.... COZ NOWADAYS, I'VE BEEN CONTRIBUTING TO THE FAMILY'S FINANCE.... I DUNT WANNA BRAG OR SOMETHING.... BUT I JUS WANNA B A RESPONSIBLE DAUGHTER N SISTER.... N SINCE IM THE ELDEST IN THE FAMILY, IT IS RIGHT 4 ME TO CONTRIBUTE TO MA FAMILY.... N IM REALLI HAPPY THT IM HELPING MA FATHER, LESSENING HIS BURDEN....

WORK:

NOWADAYS IM MORE USED TO WERK... AS IN IM MORE FAMILIAR WITH STUFFS N ALL... WELL ITS BEEN NEARLY 4 MNTHS I WERK THR.... OF COZ I SHLD B FAMILIAR.... THE ONLY THING I HATE IS THT I HAVE 2 B A SCAPEGOAT AT WERK.... IM ALWAYS THE ONE 4 SOME PPL 2 VENT THEIR ANGER AT.... THT SUXS A LOT..... BUT AGAIN 4 DA THOUSANDS TIME I HAVE 2 B PATIENT..... BUT I DUNNO 4 HW LONG CAN I B PATIENT..... COZ THTRS A LIMIT 4 EVRYTHING....... OTHA THN THT, SAME USUAL THINGY WITH BLOODY CUSTOMERS.....

NORMAL ROUTINE:

EVERYDAY ALSO GO WERK..... 1 WK, 1 DAY OFF..... QUITE TIRING, ESPECIALLY WITH THE SUCKY WEATHER.... U CANT JUS PREDICT ANYTHING WITH THE WEATHER...... OTHA THN THT, JUS JKIN ARND AT WERK WITH MA AUNT N MAMI ROKIAH... JUS 2 GET SOME LAUGHTER DOSE..... SOME PPL HAVE BEEN DOUBTING ME N AN OTHA WORKER BCOZ WE R CLOSE AT WERKK.... I MEAN PLS LAHS, HE'S LIKE 34 YRS PLD, MARRIED N HAVE 2 KIDS.... WAT MAKES U THINK THT IM DESPERATE 4 HIM???? GIVE ME A BREAK MAN..... IM QUITE CLOSE TO HIM COZ HE'S DA SECOND YOUNGEST WORKER THR AFTA ME.... SO WE JOKE ARND.... BUT SOME PPL MISTAKE THIS..... HAIZ..... HE'S MORE LIKE A BRO TO ME SIA..... I DUNNO Y N HOW PPL CAN DOUBT OUR RELATIONSHIP.......

NEW THINDS I DID IN MA LIFE IS THT FINALLY AFTA CENTURIES I OPENED AN ACC..... HOORAY!!!!!! DEPOSITED $50.... GONNA DEPOSIT MORE.... IMK REAALY GONNA SCRIMP N SAVE.... I CANT SPEND MONEY LIKE WATER.... EVRY NOTES N COINS R LIKE SO BLOODY HELL IMPORTANT.....

TMRW IS MA DAY OFF, N INSTEAD OF RESTING AT HME.... I HAVE 2 BRING MA BROz N MAID TO THE MOVIES...... I'VE PROMISED THEM, THT I WILL BRING EM WATCH NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM 2..... I HOPE THE MOVIE WILL B DARN GOOD N BETTA THN THE FERST PART.... JUS ON SAT, CONFERM IM GONA SHED TEARS COZ MA LOVELY MAID GONNA GO BAQ TO HER HOMELAND..... JUS SHE;S DA BEST..... WE'VE HAD LOADS OF LAUGHTER IN THE PAST TWO YRS...... JOKIN ARND, DOIN SILLY STUFFS, N CRYING TOO COZ BOTH OF US HAS HAD SIMILAR FATE....... JUS IM GONNA REALLY MISSS HER WEN SHE'S GONE...... HER CUTENESS.... N LAUGHTER N HER BROKEN TAMIL..... BOO HOO HOO!!!! I REALLI HOPE SHE WILL RETURN BAQ N WERK WITH MA FAMILY AGAIN......

THIS PAST WKS, I'VE BEEN HAVING REAALI DAMN PAIN BACKACHE FOR NO REASONS..... DURING THIS TIMES, I'VE BEEN THINKING TO MASELF IF IM A BURDEN.... COZ WEN IM SICK, I TROUBLE THE PPL ARND ME..... I FELT SO TERRIBLE WEN I WAS HAVING THE BACKACHE..... I COULDNT STP CRYING.....JUS FELT DARN TERRIBLE....

OKH, GTG TURN IN.... WANNA SLP EARLY....... CHAOOOSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

ARGH!!!!!!

2009-05-11T15:44:00.002+08:00

shit man!!!!

wat else cld go wrung in ma life?????

2day was ma off day.. iwas suppose 2 realz n enjoy it but now i so do not enjoy it......

im so freaking upset n dissapointed with maself..... wen i tot tht was da onli hope i cld gt into nursing......

ohk, i applied 4 nursing in TTSH.... i saw an add in the newspprs n i applied 4 it straightaway...... i sent an email to the P-I-C..... i gt a reply saying tht in 2 wks i'll knw if i gt it.....

so bloody 14 days passed.... hell i was anxious n worried..... so 2day i checked ma mail..... GUESS WAT!!!! i was called 4 an interview......... n u knw wats the icing on the cake was??????

THE INTERVIEW WAS 2DAY... AT 2..... I MISS THE INTERVIEW!!!!!! ARGHHHHH!!!!!!! FREAKIN FRUSTRATED AT MASELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IM so crying rite now....

so i contacted the person and hoped that i gt another round of interview..... she said that this interview was the last round of interview she would conduct..... she said that only 15 candidates were needed 4 da job.... now only 4 selected.... n she say tht onli if an applicant withdraw thn onli i gt a chance 4 da job if not ASTALA VISTA....

seriously, i jus am lost rite now.... i feeli like banging ma head on the wall, im askin maself repeatedly y i couldnt checked the mail earlier??????????

im reaalllii praying n hoping some asshole candidate will withdraw..... pls pls pls...... im realliii damn desperate 4 this nursing thingy.... its ma passion man!!!!

frustrated
sad
dissapointed
N PLAIN ANGRY!!!!!!

baq afta long times...

2009-04-28T21:15:00.003+08:00

hey thr..... gosh!!!! been realli bz these days, such 2 an xtent im even damn lazy 2 update ma blog.....

actualli its jus ma usual reason lazy + tired +sleepy.... like u guys knw me now, im no more the laid baq zainab i use 2 b, im a workin woman now.... hahahahs.

these few days, jus been werkin.... n now ma most 'favourite worker' is baq frm INDIA..... hw i wish he wld stay tht 4eva......

nowadays in lfe, been coming across very strange rules n regulations frm pak lebai a.k.a ma dad.....

for instance

> cannot get married, coz ma husband is waiting 4 me in heaven..... (god knws if im goin hell or heaven)

>must bcume vegeterians ( we cant eat animal's blood food)...

seriously guys, i knw some of u will laugh but 2 me im realli damn worried bout ma father..... is he learning religion on the wrong path??? nowadays, reaali wondering if thr is any new rules in the JALIL household.....

now he is more 'gentle' with me..... coz im contributing 2 da family..... im realli glad i can help ma family wich is in really dire state rite now.... due 2 financial problms..... but i realli hope all this will get betta 1 day..... till thn have 2 b reaali very very patient....

tomolow off day 4 me.... YIPPPEEE!!!!!! coz last wk, i didnt took off 4 da whole wk..... tht wk was realli damn tiring..... stocks came on da same day frm both thailand n china..... 13 huge boxes frm thailand n 8 big bloody sacks frm china..... imagine hw tired i was.....

tomolow spend 1/4 of the day sleeping n snoring... thn need 2 go n see sha2..... its benn ages since i see tht tembam n boncet kuzzie f mine...... n also wnaa blanja her swensens..... mmm.....

till thn.... bye.....

realli appreaciated it so much.....

2009-04-15T21:27:00.002+08:00

Feeling much betta this days in ma life..... 4 da pst days jus been laughing ma hearts out at ma werk place.... thanks 2 da ppl thr, especially mami rokiah....

2day, ma father said something which is like soo true...... he asked y i didnt gt ma salary 2day, wich i supposedly slhd gt..... i jus replied tht ms uncle was kinda of bz 2 day n he will give me ma pay tomolow...... thn he said i shld give him $190, 2 pay some bills...... i open heartedly said yes...... i agree, i shld contribute 2 ma family..... coz ma father is not a rich man..... its jus tht the way ma father talked 2 me, wasnt good.... make me feel so hurt......

i will definitely give money 2 ma father if he ask.... tht time wen i voluntarily gave him, he didnt even received it with both of his hand..... tht was like da most hurt moment in ma life ever..... i cried non- stp tht day.... i still remember it vividly... i jus feel gr8 n happy wen ma father speaks 2 me softly n nicely.....

so tomolow gt ma pathetic salary..... hm.... gtg buy loads of stuff lahs..... i nd 2 gt jeans.... blouses.... i jus dunt knw wat 2 wear 2 werk.... sometimes jus feel like goin naked..... lol..... i see ma own body i gt scared, if i go out naked, dunno hw many ppl will die of shocked...... thn wanna gt a bag.... been wanting 2 gt 1 frm ma ferst pay.... thn i soo nd 2 go n buy the most suitable shampoo 4 ma hair....

speaking bout hair, ma hair is jus getting terrible day by day..... falling so much..... ive no dandruff but ma hair has split ends..... sometimes i jus feel like takin scissors n snipping off ma hair.... i wanna go baq 2 those old days wen i roam the streets with ma tomboy hairstyle..... any1 gt any tips??? pls tag me.... im so desperate with ma hair.... dunno wth 2 do with it......

im thinking of doin full face threading too..... but i guess i'll postpone tht ferst.... do much more important stuff with the money.... n also this face of mine, kalau uat threading ke atau tk uat pon same ugak.... hodoh nk mampoz.....

n ya, tomolow stocks frm india comin in..... hell loads of wer 2 do...... 14 huge sacks, mind u........ guess have 2 OT lahs.......

specially 2 aisha:

dok kau conferm ke kau nk quit ITE??? kau ukan nk sibuk, aku cume nk anyer je...... aku kn skrg dh jadik an old wise woman.... suke2 advice owg..... aku cume akut kau jadik cm aku je lahs.... nanti aimless in life..... kau nk ambek private??? serious???? can apply 4 it now ehhs??? wadeva it is, u betta go n carefully research bout private courses..... n da cost too......... ill have ur baq all da time.....

buh bye

sweet 2 sour

2009-04-12T21:17:00.003+08:00

BAQ!!!!

whenever i reached this page, in ma mind, ive so much things 2 type but dunno y instead of typing wht im thinking bout, im typin sumethin else.....

u ppl jus knw tht, everyday nite wen i hope da nxt day will b a betta 1, it jus turns out 2 b da worst..... everything is happening...... so fast.... loads of things in ma lofe is falling apart.......

tears jus stream out frm these small eyes of mine n thy nvr seem 2 stop...... everynite, cant close ma eyes...... jus crying n crying..... jus sobbing silently in ma room..... within me is sufferings, crushed hopes n a life tht nvr seem 2 get betta..... its like a never-ending tale.....

the questions i asked maself???? wandering if im getting lunatic???? always talking to maself.... mind is not in peace..... always not in peace. no matter whr i am.....

father- daughter relationship gettin sour day by day..... no communication...... doubts of whether ma father loves me always arise???? dunno y, but i jus cant kick out this bloody question in ma head..... always want 2 think positively n hoping 4 da best, but AGAIN... its always da opposites tht happen.......

bcoz of bloody notes, he do this 2 me...... jus bcoz of the notes-cash...... nxt time i gt salary, jus gonna give it all 2 him if tht makes him happy.......

2 ma appa:

pa, i knw ive nt been da daughter u want me 2 b.... i knw tht very well..... im always doin things u dunt like...... till now in ma life, ive nvr did anything 2 make u feel proud tht u have a daughter like me...... education wise, im a huge loser..... wen u think i can make u proud in religion wise, i failed to do so too...... everyday, im jus makin u feel dissapointed tht u have me as ur daughter..... coz till 2day, ive nvr ever proved 2 u tht i can make u feel proud.... nvr....... i knw tht... i realise..... i nvr experienced mother love since frm da age of 4...... nvr did..... whenever i look at ota ppl's family... i always feel so jealous..... i always ask maself, y cant i have a complete n happy family???? i always wish ma runaway mother would come baq n seek me...... shower me all da love she has 4 me...... no need 2 go so far, shameer n yassin.....thy have a complete family...... always hated em bcoz of tht.... i wanna play wif ma mother too... i wanna share secrets with ma mother too... i wanna go shopping with ma mother too... i wanna gt scoldings frm ma mother too..... wen will i ever experience this???? wen???? u always tell me tht im following ma mother's bad examples..... pa, wen will u ever understand me??? wen will u express ur love 4 me??? wen will u prove 2 me tht u will always b thr 4 me?? wen pa??? wen??

gosh... realli sorry if ma bloggy this day is always dull n dry..... jus cant help it..... even woth so many ppl surrounding me, i always feel so so so lonely in this world....... any1 whu is concerned bout me pls dunt gt angry or upset wen i say this??? jus cant help it feeling this way... dunno y???? currently have a feeling tht ma father hates me 2 da core..... so aimless in life......

btw, recently saw a weddin pic of ma parents.... ma mother is so pretty.... ma stp mother cant even hold a candle to ma mother's beauty...... dunno y i cant b like tht..... i see most of ma features r like ma dad..... gonna upload the pic if i can......

bsides this, jus as usual werking n werking...... n jus waiting 2 see wat life has install 4 me...... n jus continuing 2 see ma hopes gt crushed....... day by day.......

sorry if the pics r a bit blurr......

OT!!!!

2009-04-06T21:48:00.003+08:00

yo peepz..... wassup every1????

hws y'all doin??? fine??? or like me???

2day im realli quite happy...... had loads of laughter at work..... all thanks 2 mami rokiah...... she, achma or the other two male worker nvr fail 2 make me laugh 1 day.....

jus feel very gr8 afta laughing so much at werk 2day...... jus came baq frm werk coz 2day had OT till 8..... reached JP, went 2 basement n sho 4 a while thn head baq hme.....

nowadays, dunno y everyday looking 4ward 2 werk..... i knw it sounds ridiculous but i dunno wats rung with me...... jus feel so happy 2 b surrounded by ma achma whu is getting slimmer day by day..... n i have 2 mention sumething bout her..... she's very self-conscious...... always very worried bout wat ppl will think or say bout her..... hahahs..... funni sia......

she's jus da best aunt any1 could get..... happening..... thn mami rokiah whu is like a 'lawyer'..... she n her high heels..... she cute lahs..... laugh n laugh onli.... but wen her temper comes, no1 shld fool with her....

reach hme onli, no laughter, n smile, nothin.... jus me n ma shit face..... no1 2 talk with.... gt ma bro lahs, daniyal..... most of the time we talk b4 ma father gt hme..... he will tell bout his nonscene friends story n me bout werk.....

nowadays feeli like there's no 1 2 talk to..... BLOG came 2 ma rescue...... i feel a lot more betta if i blog..... dunno y??? jus read an email frm caci milah.... aw.....

this part is dedicated 2 caci milah:

THANKS loads 4 ur email..... u dunno hw i felt wen i read the content.... i knw 4 sure ma father loves me... of coz.... but sometimes da way he bhaves n act towards me makes me feel tht im sucha a burden 4 him..... tht he regretted tht i born into this werld...... caci this is ma ferst time werkin..... ferst time i gt paid 4 da werk i did.... of coz im damn excited lahs.... like i earned da money all 4 maself..... btw this is da ferst time in life tht i received sucha a amt jus 4 me..... n thn i buy important stuffs 4 me..... its nk like i waste em unreasonably..... n this time ma father scold me bcoz i opened a hp line n gt a free hp..... tu pon kene marah..... alah caci, i dunt wanna recall this matter again.... jus hurt me..... jus knw tht i love ma dad a lot.... da sacrifices he did..... but as 4 me, ma father said tht he played the role of a mother n father 2 me n daniyal...... as a father i 100% agree.... but as for being a mother, i dunt think so.... i dunno 4 daniyal, but 4 me till now he nvr proved to me he could b both a mother n father 2 me.... i kwn its hard n he's trying...... i'll jus have 2 b very ver patient like im always am......

as 4 ma looks, i knw i have 2 stp degrading maself... but dunno y jus cant help it..... hhahahahsahs...... as 4 da suicidal thingy..... dunt werry.... im not foolis n stoopid 2 do such stuff... its jus things i think in the nick of time..... whenever i think of such stuffs, onli 2 person comes 2 ma mind.... n tht person is ma bro.....

thanks so much caci...... thanks again.... feel betta afta reading ur mail.... thanks again.... i will try out da ways u teach me..... mayb it will werk out....

woah!!!! too much werds on ma bloggy.... gotta add somepics......

currently missing kuzzins gathering.......

k bye peepz, gtg turn in.... werk.....

TC N NITES.....

2009-04-03T22:29:00.003+08:00

Feeling so MISERABLE, HOPELESS, WORTHLESS........

feel like im a hell of a burden 2 ma father..... sometimes thinking tht ma father regrets having me as a daughter....

i don pray..... very stubborn...... in ma appa words; im bcoming jus like ma mother ina bad way.......

dunno y, these damn tears jus flow out everyday...... currently jus hate the fcuking weather at chinatown!!!!! too hot n humid....... wen its raining, it will b raining the whole day..... wen its hot it will b freaking hot all day.....

b4 i go, ppl whu r reading ma blog, PLS PLS PLS PLS, keep all this to urself...... soon im gonna put private...... ppl pls dunt tell any1 bput ma matters, even 2 those close ones in ur life.... PLS!!!!!

labels: HATE WHU I AM!!!! WHAT I LOOK LIKE!!!! fat pig......

argh!!!!!! wen will i shed these bloody kiloS of mine.... everyday also werk, everyday also sweat.... but still da same.......

in this rate of mine n ugliness, hw will i find a guy???? nowadays, look is very very important...... seriously, i dunt think there's any guy out thr whu wants me...... mayb all the freaking old mamaS........ BOO HOO HOO

WATS HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-04-02T21:00:00.003+08:00

Realli very very sorry 4 nt updating.......

this zainab has no aim in life..... n constantly does not understand her relationship wif her father.......

i jus feel like spilling out the whole issue with ma father...... but very lazy wanna type.... as some ppl knw im a very slow typer.....

i dunno y is this happening..... already in this world i have no mother..... jus WTFH is ma mother???? whr is she??? wat is she doin??? does she even remembers she has a daughter n a son??? wen will she come baq??? would she even recongnise me???

the amount of tears i she everyday, onli the four walls in ma room knws...... wen i feel everyday will get betta, it jus turns out 2 b da opposite...... y lahx??? ma relationship wif ma father is getting sour as day pass by..... we rarely even talk.....

YS'day was da most worst day 4 me..... da words tht came out of ma father mouth..... pierce within me...... hurt me like crazy...... felt so worthless n terrible ys'day..... now im typing n crying too..... jus hate this tears...... feelin so miserable rite now.... jus want a shoulder 2 lean on....... jus want somebody rite now..... n i want tht person 2 say tht he/she will b thr 4 me 4eva......

now im werkin n gettin pay..... i dunno y it pisses ma father off so much tht i use ma own hard earned money on maself..... ys'day i opened a hp line.... under ma aunt's name...... n ma fatther was even more worried thn me tht can i pay the bill...... he even send a msg to me sayin tht now im a big gerl, i dunt have 2 consult him anymore if i want 2 do anything...... its good enuff i msged him saying tht i wanna open a hp line......
actualli this story is freakin long but ill jus summarise da whole fcukin thing.....

now in ma father, eye im a stubborn headed girl, whu doesnt knw hw 2 repay baq his kindness n sacrifices he did 4 me..... im nt a good big sister..... im a lazy bum whu doesnt knw anything xceot 4 listening 2 music n otha stuff tht makes me wander in this world...... im a girl whu follows ma mother bad footsteps...... ..

4 now im jus gonna leave like this..... the story is still incomplete like hw ma life is... i still have patience in me...... like i told aisha, once ma father cross tht patience line of mine... im jsu gonna run 2 da 15th floor n jump dwn frm thr...... i jus cant stand anymore of this..... let ma soul wander in this werld....... i dunt care..... i jus wanna put a full stop 2 everything in ma life..... jus so sick man.... sick!!!!!

i love ma appa???? i hate ma appa???? still finding da answer....

i must b da ferst daughter on earth 2 ask maself this question......... does ma appa even love me??? da way he talked to me makes me say no....... he say he cares but i cant see hw he cared??? omg!!!! i feel so miserable.......

will thr b a happy ending or sad ending 2 ma life or will thr b no ending 2 ma life at all????

y??????

2009-03-23T21:52:00.001+08:00

PROMISE WILL UPDATE VERY SOON!!!!!

AGAIN MA APOLOGIES!!!

JUS DAMN XHAUSTED N SLEEPY.....

WILL UPDATE WEN IM FREE N AWAKE!!!!!

TC!!!!!!

BAQ!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-03-17T21:36:00.002+08:00

realli ver sowwiiiee 4 nt updating ma blog..........

life's goin on as usual..... work+ home+ no life in ma life

jus saw ma dear kak moi on sat, da day i off..... no werk..... time flies man!!!! in a blink of an eye da whole day is gone.....

saw her, talk..... pity her life man!!!! she is in sucha a dire state...... well kak moi, if u r reading, jus now tht this sri lankan kuzzie is here jus 4 u..... n this goes out too sha2 n kak naz too...... jus knw tht i will b here 4 u guys if u need me..... lurve all of u.....

getting fatter!!!! AGAIN!!!!! life is jus meaningless 4 me..... jus plain useless.... can sumebody teach me 2 appreciate life???? any1????

so this sat, is the grand wedding..... well 4 now ma mind is set on wearing ma las yr raye's baju..... let me think again..... can wait 4 this sat..... grand place..... modern folks..... but ma family will jus eat + sit n come..... since ma father thinks tht the wedding is held in a non-islamic way...... well, open dance floor n kude kepang r highlights of the wedding......

~k, peepz..... TC!!!! MAY GOD BLESS US ALL WITH GOOD HEALTH N MIND!!!!! KEEP SMILING..... HIDE ALL UR TROUBLES WITH THT GOLDEN SMILE.....

p/s i always do this but still it makes no difference!!!!!

dead beat

2009-03-13T21:50:00.002+08:00

WAHHHH!!!! 2DAY damn tired sehy...... realli damn tired......

GOSH!!!!! jus want somebody 2 massage me.... any1 care 2 volounteer??? hehehehehs....

2day mami rokiah nvr come so, it was hard on me n ach..... especially in da morning.....

series of events tht happened 2dy morning:
~ opened shop 15mins late
~took out all da heavy clothes trolleys
~customers start comin in(jus hate it wen customers patronise the shop wen its nt fully opened)
~souvenirs + pants dropped coz i wasnt strong enough 2 push it
~more n more customers came +raining +2 kimono trolleys fall on top of each other

imagine the hardships i went thru..... n i did all this with an empty stomach n im having ma menses..... so can u blieve it..... HUNGRY +STOMACH CRAMPS.....

finally settled down, had ma breakfast at 1230, OOOPPPSSSS, its no more caled a breakfast, its lunch time...... Ach more worst, no time 2 eat at all..... she was attendin 2 customers n arranging clothes.......

afta tat, werk n werk n werk n werk...... thn mistook some guy 4 some1..... smiled at him somemore...... wahh!!!! his gf gonna bash me up..... dunt understnd wat im talkin bout, ask me personally......

SO TOMOLOW MA OFF DAY..... YIPPEEEE!!!!!! YAHOOOO!!!!! HOOORRRAAAYYYY!!!!!

gonna relax n slp n eat the whole day..... mcm phm je...... ma dad gonna slaughter me if i do this tomolow......

k ppz ADIYOS SAMIYOS!!!!!!

running out of cash!!!!! ARGH!!!! NITEMARE!!!!!

its jus gone.... jus like tht....

2009-03-11T21:14:00.002+08:00

hi....

so 2day, ma uncle was baq afta long gone 2 overseas..... so work as per normal.... me in charge of souvenirs......

werk i have 2 do:

put magnets (arrange them neatly too)
keychains
top-up kids n sdults spore tee shirts..... (sizes ranging frm XS 2 XXL)

otha thn this, jus helping mami rokiah with the stocks n arranging the clothes....

but the most toughest job is opening the shop...... its jus soo messy.....
i gotta practically wrestle with the clothes trolley..... everytime n evry morning..... jus so plain irritating.... 1 day im gonna time maself wen i opened the shp.... see hw long it takes......

da shop is freakingly huge, u will onli knw hw big the shp, wen u see it........ n its sooo hot!!!! evry minute, ill b drenched in ma smelly n sticky sweat...... its a good thing i bring ma body spray evry day......

so 2day, afta werk..... went to JP.... well i evryday, walk at JP..... hahahas.... but 2day, went 2 basement n bought some stuffs......

bought a bag, sandals, some chains n a drink..... $50 jus went wasted jus like tht...... haiz...... i still gt soo many things 2 but n i cant seem 2 save ma money....... ARHGH!!!!!

I've gotta stp spending n start saving..... til now i havnt open ma bank acc yet..... haiz haiz haiz......

k peepz, updated ma blog already... so now gtg turn in....

~ADIYOS N NITES~

WOAH!!!! its been veri veri long

2009-03-10T21:49:00.002+08:00

I LOVE MA BLOG!!!!!

WOOHOOO!!!!! LURVE IT.....

IM BAQ!!!! miss me any1??? hahahs... i knw no wld..... so ma life goin on as per normal.....

more n more lectures frm ma father...... again bout ma religion..... but sometimes wadeva he says is truth..... ma religion is islam but im not acting as 1.... y???? y cant i jus take the prayers book n learn how 2 pray???

brought in some fortune 4 somepl at wrk.... hmmmm..... its a secret.....

till now i havnt gt a proper dress for the wedding..... haiz......

on sun annie, lina n jia wei drop by ma shop.... i meant ma working place..... hahahas.... laugh laugh laugh non stp..... annie did a dance n was seen by a man in da opp shop..... lol!!! n she even acted as a THAI woman..... jia wei looked as though she lose weight.... hmm..... lina as usual, the samllest 1......

otha thn this jus werkin...... talkin n jokin arnd with a worker thr..... n mami rokiah nvr fails 2 make me laugh.....n aunt ramlah is CONSTANTLY dead worried bout her hair...... haiz!!!! these is wat tht makes me ready 4 werk!!!!

ohk gtg turn in..... prepare 4 werk tomolow.....

for now jus worrying bout ma hair, IT IS GETTING BALD!!!! ARGH!!!!

DEAD BEAT!!!

2009-03-05T21:53:00.002+08:00

Jus took a nice long bath...... washed ma hair n felt thoroughly clean......

2day went baq 2 werk...... felt strange.... dunno y???? hmmmm.....

suddenly felt so fat n ugly..... (well this feeling ain't always comes 2 day, it ALWAYS happens....)

jus came baq frm tekka with ma dear aunt, mami fida n marsha..... i dunno hw 2 spell tht cutie name...... she's jus sooo adorable...... so cute...

afta ate chicken masala wif briani..... mmmm..... yummy..... we headed dwn to the market...... jus lookin at punjabu suits 4 da wedding..... i wanted 2 buy an anakili punjabi.... but jus couldnt find any tht attracted ma eyes....

gt 1 punjubi suits damn nice but I COULDNT WEAR IT!!!! boo hoo hoo..... always like this..... wadeva i like, i cant wear..... coz simple...... ma boobs r fuckin big..... ma buttocks triple the size of ma boobs..... n im a fat pig....... somethin i jus feel like squashing these boobs n buttock of mine.......

now 4 a moment, im envying flat chested woman...... haiz.......

k babes n dudes, gtg turn in....... sleepy.......

~nites N tc!!!!!~

woah!!! its been long, long time.....

2009-03-04T21:50:00.002+08:00

WASSUP??? WASSUP EVRYBODY???? HW Y'ALL DOIN??? GOOD?? BAD??

LOLz.....

Its been long since i blogged... Now its time 4 ma fingers 2 get 2 werk n type..... well well well.....

hm...... ohk let me start by saying tht on sun, ma father successfully ended ma NANI'S 1 yr death anniversary in ma hse...... felt great coz all ma aunties turned up, well Xcept 4 caci jija..... well i dunt wanna elaborate y she didnt come......

so i took off on sun, help out in da hse.... well nt realli coz i was damn tired..... foods were ordered frm ma NANI'S bro.... da food was nice but too sad thr wasnt sambal chicken..... the early berds were kak naz family...... she look different tht day, i dunno y, but she looked more chubby..... hmmmm.....

thn more kuzzins came.... n ya kak moi nvr come too.... BOO HOO HOO....
it was raining very heavily..... wanted 2 'lepak' under the blk but cant..... bu atlast we did jus 4 a while, wothout kak naz..... she left coz of sumething......

thn all went baq hme n i saw a wedding invitation card.... GUESS WHU'S WEDDING WAS IT??? it was a 17 yr old gerl's wedding....... i knw her.... we used 2 b quite close wen we were way younger...... OMG!!! at 17, she's gonna start a matrimonial life.... can u imagine it??? well wadeva it is, jus wishin her all da best...... her wedding's gonna b a grand 1.......

2day was ma off day.... whole day slackin at hme...... watched SLUMDOG MILLIONAIR..... ATlast...... its a masterpiece..... lurve the movie but mostly lurve da music...... im gonna watch it again....

2day, jus wasted the whole day watchin TV, lazying arnd n eating.... im so gonna GAIN weight AGAIN!!!!

tomolow werkin... so gtg turn in early....... till here thn.....

will update soon......

yippeee!!!! PAY DAY....

2009-02-27T21:23:00.001+08:00

IM VERY HAPPY 2DAY.....

gt ma pay.....
bought a lot of things.... actualli most needed stuff..... i dunt wanna spend loads of money on unnecessarry stuff...... its nt worth it....

things 2 buy/ do:

bag
body lotion
top up ez-link n HP
open a bank acc n deposit $100 or $150 in it (gotta start saving)
blouses.....

As 4 now, jus these stuffs..... now jus chillin at hme.... watching some VIDs...... n bloggin.....

quite tired at werk..... The werk thr seems never-ending...... jus so tiring.... waiting patiently 4 ma nursing results...... *cross fingers*....

many ppl say, tht i lose weight already.... YIPPEEE!!!! nowadays feelin so 'watched'.... dunno y??? but fell like whenever, im doin something, i have a feeling tht somebody is watching...... hmmmm..... a spy prhaps??? hahahahs...

nt sure lahx?? nowadays thr so many ppl thr r jus so 'freakin concerned' bout otha ppl matters.......

k, gonna turn in..... very tired..... tomolow gt werk.....

~ADIYOS~

reaallii, jus so sick n tired..... dunt wanna gt involve....

2009-02-25T21:08:00.002+08:00

i dunno y nowadays, ppl r gettin more n more nosey.... everytime wanna poke their nose into ppl's business....

'jage lahx hal tepi kain tu dulu, aru nk gi etul kn kain2 owh lain'..... damn stress sia..... no matter hw i dunt wanna gt involved in some issues, atlast or somehow, gt invoved too.....

tsk..... jus so damn irritating sia.... arhg!!!! wanna get of all this entangled mess..... some1 pls save me......

already i've nowhere n no1 2 confide all ma matters with..... currently cousins n bestie r ma pillar of strength..... hope they dunt fail on me..... but i knw 4 best, they WUNT!!!!

k lahs ppl till here onli.... later if i elaborate too much on ma life, certain assholes will read em...... haiz.... i dunno y so many ppl now r so 'caring' bout ma life.......

MISSING BESTIE, COUSINS GET 2 GETHER....... want em reaally quick.......

its OFFILCIAL!!!!!!

2009-02-23T21:41:00.002+08:00

2day was da OSCAR'S........ i was realli darn sad coz i couldnt watch it..... i was, as usual slogging out hard at werk...... thn i heard via the radio tht, ma favourite music composer: A.R RAHMAN won nt 1 but two oscars........

im so proud of him..... i dunt think its onli me tht is proud 4 him, da whole werld is..... an indian men wins oscars..... its sucha a big deal...... gosh!!! im so happy 4 him...... just lurve every composition of his......

wen thr's a need 4 melodious sng; he always knws hw 2 werk it out well......
went thr's a need 4 dappakuttu sng; darn he's da best... every joint in ur body will move 2 his beat.....

tamil, hindi, english, telegu n ALSO CHINESE...... all this language, he has composed a sng b4.... tell me, he jus THE BEST!!!!!

darn i gotta watch this movie, SLUMDOG MILLIONAIR...... da leading guy in da movie, is kinda cute.... hmm.........

ok, leave bout the movie thingy aside....... wats been happening in ma life???

wat shall i say??? hmmm......

jus seriously dunno wth am i doin in ma life..... NO DREAMS!!!! NO AMBITION!!!! NO TARGETS!!!! jus been wondering..... wat am i gonna do in ma life.... if ma nurse application is nt successful??? thn whr will i go??? wat will i b??? will i end up being aimless in ma life?? i jus have no answers 2 these questions.....

loads of things have happened in ma life......

*father thinks tht ma aunt is more important thn him, 4 me.....
here's a short summary of wat happened;
gt ma pay..... gave ma aunt $100, TO BUT GOLD EARRINGS 4 ME!!!! nt 4 anything else.... but father thinks tht ma aunt is more important thn him..... jus wanted 2 gave money 2 him thn he say like tht....... ha heart jus broke into million pieces sia..... so pain wen ur own parent think tht some otha ppl r more important thn thm......
argh 4get it..... actualli thrs more 2 da story but i dunt wanna reaccl it al baq.... memories tht r sour....

*ma HP came baq 2 live..... ma dad repaired it 4 free..... YI[PPPEEEE!!!!!
can hear sngs again..... can camwhore again..... but onli 1 thing is wrung... ma darn USB spoil siak..... i reaalllii wanted 2 upload pics in this post..... but cant.... too bad!!!

*many ppl say, i slimmed dwn.....
well, wat do i say??? hardships in life made me slimmer..... hahahahahs..... werkin aite, thts y slimmed dwn a bit....

*again werkin..... sweatin...... pushing stoopid trolleys..... scratching ma head early mornig, coz dunno wat 2 wear 4 werk.....
talkin bout werk, thr has been a new addition 2 the workforce..... a new guy named HAJA.... some relations of uncle mus ( the manager thr n da idiotic guy, idg bwg tht i was mentioning in ma previ0s post)..... he 's fat n short.... hahahahs..... n he looks like ma eldest kuzzie, bayi...... reaaly the same......

*missing ma fwens a lot these days.....
jus wanna go baq to those times whr in class, instead of paying attention, we were looking at 'HOT BANGLAS' n laughing at em..... miss also kin hong n aisha fights........ hhahahahahasss......

now gonna go turn in....... ... oh ya, now as u can see, ma bloogggyyy has a new look.... THANKS 2 MA DEAR SHA2.... leaving off with ma fav sng of a.r rahman..... lurve the movie n da sng.... ENJOY!!!

2009-02-19T22:57:00.002+08:00

I'LL UPDATE VERY VERY SOON....... REALLI DAMN TIRED N SLEEPY FOR NOW........ SORRY!!!!

jus wanna sat sumething b4 sleeping, wadeva PARENTS do its ALWAYS the BEST 4 the children...... (mcm phm).....

LoADz have haPPENed.....

2009-02-16T19:09:00.002+08:00

MY.... MY..... MY........ LOADS HAVE HAPPENED IN MA LIFE SINCE THE LAST DAY I BLOGGED........

these days have been so exhausted coz new clothing stocks frm INDIA has arrived at the shp...... so basically: unpacking of stocks + hanging em + attending 2 shameless customers (do u knw y i called em shameless??? coz the clothes in the shp is already selling at a good price n they STILL ask 4 a discount...... darn assholes......) + afta taking ut the enuff stocks, thn must arrange em properly in the store place which s already packed n small.......

jus bein realli veri bz with werk....... n also bein a 'person' involved in ABF matters...... i dunt wanna discuss this matter veri openly in the blog..... later some idiotic pplZ will read em n spread the news everywhr jus like a VIRUS......

this matter is realli getting out of hands...... frm a small spark it has turned into a raging fire..... HAIZ....... y is all this happening in ma family???? jus wish it will end soon......

so 2day, had a day off coz i cant stand ma terrible stomach cramps...... al thanks 2 ma gerl thingy..... ya so at hme all day doin nothin but relaxing maself n watchin TV....

oh ya on sat, i went 2 watch BILLU BARBER...... FYI the movie was a hindi remake of KUSELAN...... i still prefer the tamil version.....

hindi version, of coz the sngs all damn nice..... love maarjaani song but hated kareena kapoor..... dunno y... jus hate her..... damn.... priyanka chopra damn sizzling sia..... lurve her BOD.... a killer BOD she has..... deepika also made an appearance in love mera hit hit..... i tink so tht was da sng titte????

deepika jus didnt looked sexy in tht sng even though she was wearing skimpy clothes..... she is jus nt sexy... she's tall but has no assets...... n she didnt look as beautiful as in her debut film..... OM SHANTI OM..... onli in tht movie, she look darn pretty.... now getting bored seeing her face.....

told ya was gonna upload some pics but wat 2 do??? both USB n HP spoil..... ma 'appa' gonna chnge it..... so as 4 now im baq 2 using ma old NOKIA HP.... eventhough tht HP has no MP3, bluetooth n watso ever tht new phones have.... i still like it coz its damn cute n compact......

k, ppl gotta go...... jus hope tomolow is a better one......

SCK OF EVERYTHING.... WAT ELSE COULD GO WRUNG?????

2009-02-12T21:51:00.003+08:00

GOSH!!! ITS BEEN CENTURIES SINCE I BLOGGED.....
im reaalli verry soorryyy!!!!!

realli am damn bhind time.... its like time have left me all alone in the past..... now im no more the ZAINAB who knws entertainment news at the tips of ma fingers.... im no more the ZAINAB who knws whats da lstest sng n otha stuufzzz...... im so way baq in time.... i've gotta catch up.........

wat else, if its nt werk wich have been keeping me bz.... come baq onli, tired.... whenever wanna blog, felt like the bed is calling me..... asking me 2 rest ma body on the soft sheets on fluffy pilllows..........

actualli hell LOADS of things have happened in ma life n is still happening...... hw i wish i cld share with all ma readers????

*ma Hp spoil...... it dropeed into the sink while i was washing ma hands...... ARGH!!!!! now everything okie dokie xcept 4 tht i CANNOT listen 2 ma Mp3...... boo hoo hoo...... i want 2 listen ta ma sngs damn badly......

*some confidential matters..... surrounding ma family...... cant realli share it.... its oni between me n maself.... well nt realli....

*sick n tired of everthing in ma life......

*fashion loser

*had a day sleepover at sha2's place n had a day sleepover at kak naz's place..... both sleepovers also got scoldings frm ma dad......

gt this msg frm ma dad wen i asked permission 2 slp at kak naz's hse:

Kau mcm2 y u dont to to urself. Always got reason. Tis goin to b u last sleeping outside ur own hse......

this was exaclty the msg i gt frm ma father...... LOLs..... haiz, ppl if fail PSLE 3 times like this lahx.....

*stay both hse, had gr8 funs..... fashionista..... lepak under bloks n i saw da adorable SOLIHIN..... aw...... he's da new guy in ma life.....

*watched raaz 2....... wahhhh.... damn shoik sia..... i lurve EMRAAN HASHMI..... hate kangana..... but lurve her acting in raaz 2..... she realli looked like 1 ghost...... lurve maahi ve song...... u shld catch it too.....

*life's (now) all bout werk n comin baq hme..... do still watch movie... thanks 2 ma dear achma...

*hmmm..... wat else 2 blog..........

currently missing ma fwends...... miss aisha laughter always...... hope i'll b in the same ite as her....

*i recently went 4 a nursing seminar...... applied 2 enrolled nursing in nitec.... ite simei..... i hope i gt it.... i dunt meet 1 of the requirement... must have 2 yrs of werking xperience..... haiz... hope i gt it.....

miss kuzzins outing 2getha...... now kinda of planning 2 watch AYAN with kak naz on her second time.... feel like watching raaz2 (again) with the kuzzies.....

CANT WAIT 4 MA PAY!!!!

THANKS A GAZZILION 2 CACI MILAH COZ SHE WAS DA 1 WHU INFORMED ME BOUT THE NURSE SEMINAR N SHA2 4 CHNGING MA BLOG.... LURVE IT N U......

now gotta go slp... dunt wanna wake up late 4 werk......

BYE.... promise i'll cont update ma blog...... soon gonna upload hell loads of pics...... ma USB now spoil, so cant...... BYE!!!!

tired...... tired.... sleepy..... wants some1 2 massage ma legs coz they r achin...

2009-02-04T21:43:00.003+08:00

HARLOW PPL.....

its jus been sucha a tiring day...... rite now jus wish any kind soul would massage ma legs 4 free..... any1 out thr??? hehehehs....

2day, went 2 werk n was bz.... hell LOADS of werk 2 do... 2day da new clothings stock arrived frm thailand..... so did ma uncle..... he also arrived frm thailand.....
went he came, each 1 (me, mami rokian n achma) of us got a 'talk' frm him..... he was nice wen he talked 2 me..... well it was regarding the sun thingy.... (on tht sun,coincidentally, me, achma n mami rokiah took off, n 'somebudy' tot tht we pre-planned evrything n purposely dunt wnna come werk)......
terrible sia..... thn tht 'person' act good sia in frnt of us.... idiot..... suck ma toes man!!! i was realli damn sick sia tht sun.... flu+headache+whole body achin....

ok leave tht.... let bygones b bygones...... so 2day was opening stocks thn kak moi came..... she ah damn pretty sia n so stylish..... well all ma female kuzzins r very stylish n beautiful XCEPT 4 ME!!!!! ~haiz~....... i always dress up like 1 aunty.... with ma sucky hair n shit type face...... ARGH!!!! IM getting veryy irritated with maself.....

I REALLLLI WANNA GO 4 SOME MAKEOVER OR FULL TRANSFORMATION 4 MASELF!!!!

realli desperate 4 1........ thn.... I SAW MA LONG-LOST FWEND... YANI...... GSOH REALLI HAD FUN MIXIN WITH HER...
she's reaalli damn funni..... cute.... n i kinda of adore her eyebrows..... the strangest thing is tht, 4 this past few days, i've been realli yearning 2 meet her..... N I DID.... rite in frnt of ma nose..... had a chat with her, she slimmed down sia.... ppl i meet afta so long, all slimmed down XCEPT 4 ME....... sometimes i feel like starving maself sia..... IM IKE SOO FAT!!!

we also XCHANGED noS....... gonna msg her wen im free..... thn afta tht cont werk, werk n werk...... TOMOLOW anotha day of werk...... k bye ppeesss.....

WHAT DO I DO?????

2009-02-01T22:01:00.006+08:00

whr shall i began frm??? ma life is jus soo complicated??? all i can do is CRY n CRY!!! Y?? am i suffering like this??

HAPPY 15TH BELATED BIRTHDAY 2 MA BRO, THOSEI..... ( i gave him $10).... LOLz....

~haiz~

i begin this blog post, feeling very down... feeling worthless...... ma life mayb a joke 2 some ppl, but 4 me it isnt.. n seriously it isnt.... im onli turning 18 now, n i have soo much problems 2 handle......

ferst of all, realli sorry 4 not posting properly.... im reall xhausted n feeling very sick these days......

nose blocks+headache+toothache+stomac cramps+ n da whole body is aching...

ya... ya... i knw... i knw.... im sucha a complain queen like wat kak naz told me..... LOLz.... now i realli realli knw da hardships of werkin..... u jus gotta impress everybody.... b more mature n responsible.......

let me start with recalling ma memory 4 this past few days..... hmmm....

hmmmm... whr shall i start frm.....

father scoldings (trying 2 feel his love 4 me... but cant... jus seems 2 wander if he event loves me anymore.....

nvr go werk 4 a day, gt so many problems.... thanks 2 1 idiotic person.... GOSH!!! jus hate him..... he's like a person with a mask on.....

watch villu (a vijay n nayantara starrer)....

review:

*nice cute scenes of nayan n vijay

*fuNny n hillarious vadivelu comedy....

*some rockin songs (daddy n mummy)

oh ya, we watch this complicated movie in da most 'wonderful cinema ever'...... jus gr8... awesome perhaps....... n its become sha2's favourite cinema.... hahahas...... go n read her blog 4 more dtails bout the cinema.... im jus too tired 2 type...

*werking n xhausting maself in the shop....ppl jus dunt understand tht i slogged out at werk n not jus stand thr 4 show.......

*hate ma lappie, wireless internet..... coz suddenly will shu dwn.... n ma ys day's blog post was not saved.... i typed a long long post ys day.... too bad i cant show u guys.....

NOW, jus wandering bout ma life.... yes yes i knw... its da same old boring thing im doin...... coz ive nothin else 2 werry thn ma FUTURE.....

WILL ENDED UP BEIN A LOSER???? WITH NO CHILDREN N HUSBAND???? WILL I ENDED UP LIKE A PERSON WHU HAS NO SELF-ESTEEM??? (WELL THIS DOESNT SUPRISE ME, COZ IM THT NOW!!!) WILL I HAVE A GOOD CAREER??? WILL I DO SOMETHIN IM PASSIONATE BOUT??? (NURSING, DANCING) WILL I MAKE MA FATHER PROUD OF ME?? WILL I BRING GLORY TO MA FAMILY????

jus bein 18, ive lots 2 think bout...... 18 only like this, if im 21???? haiz... thinking bout it, is sending ma goosebumps already??? K, PPL.... TC!!!! gonna upload some pics.... coz ma few entries have rather been too werdy....

N THANKS 2 NOORAISHA BTE ESAH 4 CHNGING MA BLOGSKIN!!! ITS NICE.... THANKS...

EXHAUSTED n SLEEPY

2009-01-29T23:21:00.002+08:00

SOWIE MA DEAR FAITHFUL READERS 4 NOT POSTING PROPERLY.......

Gosh!!! has been realli bz n tired this past few days..... ~haiz~ kate kerje kn??? mestilahs pnat.....

hmmmm.... let me recount baq 4 wat happened this past few days in ma life.....

* got a new phone..... (LG; KM380T).....
hmmmm....... da new phone ohk..... can use..... but the batt gt problemo a bit... quite frequently flat..... i Xchange ma hp with ma beloved appa....... THANKS appa!!!!

*been realli spending most of ma time, at werk.....
did i tell, tht mami rokiah a.k.a sha2's future mother in law is SO FREAKIN hillarious..... everytime, im with her i'll start laughing...... she's jus oo funny..... she n her one of a kind laughter.... n did i tell, she is someone whu still does chew betel nut leaf......

*went 2 east coast on the second day of lunar new yr with the whole family; well xclude kak moi's family.....
'apro enna'..... as usual i kena sunburn..... i look like a freakin nigerian..... well i do always look like tht.... so NOOO freakin difference..... LOLz.....
oh.... n ya.... kak naz gt a freaking encounter with a weirdo china man..... hahahahahahs........ still cant stp laughing.....

well thts probably da most fun things i did..... otha thn tht, i've been werkin everyday at SB's shop in CHINATOWN frm 0930 till 1830...... thts all..... n ya.... i've nothin 2 wear....

n also, i heard a biggest secreat ever in ma whole entire life......... realli wish all tht didnt happened........

im realli now in so much dilemma..... i dunno if i jus shld stick 2 ma temporary plan bout ma future OR????? im still figuring out ma life...... its jus sooo complicated...... i jus dunt wanna make a decision which i will regret yrs later......; after all thr's no use of crying over spilled milk.....

currently, dilemma 4 tomolow; dunno wat 2 wear 4 werk....... n 4 anotha 1 week, no salary..... SB go thailand.....

BYE!!!!

legs aching.... cant take it...

2009-01-25T23:09:00.004+08:00

harlow ppl......

GOSH!!!

has been realli very tired this past few days coz of WERK.... ma bod aching n i stink a lot too..... lolZ...

so.... a lot of things have chnged this past few days....

*start werkin at ma uncle's (SB) shop.....
*frm 0930 a.m to 1830 p.m
*actualli, da pay quite pathetic but im kinda of fortunate.....
its betta tht i get something rather than nothing.....
*ma dear sha2 cnged ma blogskin.....
THANK YOU MA DEAREST....... (n dunt werry, i'll never figure out how 2 chng blogskins afta umpteen timez u told n show me how to..... LOLz....

now i realli understand da hardship of werkin..... GOSH!! its not simple... its realli tiring n u still have 2 put on a fake smile 2 please the customers.....

these customers can b realli veri sweet n considerate but this r onli some of them.... othaz r simply inconsiderate...... n so unpolite......
but, i've 2 b patient...... it sumething im not normally am..... hehehes...

NOW:

still figuring out wat 2 do with ma life???? gonna continue studying, which i WILL DEFINITELY!!!!
its jus tht i dunno wat n whr???? must b cheap n affordable..... im kinda of thinking, 4 tis yr i werk fulltime ferst n mayb take some part time study courses.....
thn nxt yr, afta saving $$$$$$, i wanna enroll maself in MDIS n do mass comm.....

this is jus a mayb plan???? still nt sure yet..... i jus 4 once, wanna decide 4 ma own life..... JUS ME DECIDING 4 MA OWN LIFE..... PLS PPL, LET ME DO IT......

n of coz, im gonna start learning ma prayers...... MUST N DIE DIE get it learn fast so tht i;ll b a proud ISLAM!!!!!

k, ppl till here onli.... realli darn tired..... wanna go sleep... tomolow must werk half day... so......

btw jus wanna wish ppl whu r celebrating CNY;

A HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR....... GONG XI FA CAI...... MAY UR LIFE B BLESSED WITH GOOD HEALTH, WEALTH N PROSPERITY......... B HAPPY.......... TC!!!!!!!

misery, tears, sucky life n thoughts of suicidal......

2009-01-22T23:32:00.002+08:00

*CRYING*

PPL I CANT GO MDIS!!!! CANT TAKE DA COURSE I WANT.... NEITHER CAN I TAKE MASS COMM NOR TOURISM........ Y IS ALL THIS HAPPENING TO ME??? Y???

i realli dunno wat 2 do with this life of mine...... recently went 2 MDIS with kak moi 2 enquire bout the courses..... realli happy coz i gt mass com n tourism based on ma Os..... but the fees quite expen..... but still affordable.....

asked ma father n he asid NO...
he says tourism a lot of socialising n so is mass comm..... WTFH???? everywhr u go u need to socialize aite???? i jus dunno wat is wrung with him..... he keeps tellin me tht i let otha ppl decide 4 ma own life...... huh??? ya but he;s true..... HE IS DA 1 THT IS DECIDING 4 MA LIFE........

EVERYTIME HE BRINGS UP BOUT RELIGION........ he brings up bout 'jodoh'??? wth??
im gonna skool... wat jodoh??? this is all thanks 2 1 fucking person in this whole wide werld..... i knw he's da 1 tht poison n brainwash ma father's brain.....

ma father wants me 2 chk out nursing thingy at hospitals...... see if i can get nursing thr..... he thinks i dunt like nursing anymore.....

HELLO, I LOVE NURSING K..... its jus since, wen i fail ma maths n sci.... i've lode hope in nursing.... n i dunt wanna retake ma maths n sci again..... like kak moi said......

i studied for the first time n i failed ma Os..... wat makes it so sure tht im gonna pass da second time???? i've NO CONFIDENCE.... n i dunt wanna wasta ma father money n time..... haiz????

any1 out thr in same situation as me????

PULL ME OUT FRM THIS SITUATION....... GIVE ME MA LIFE BAQ..... LAUGHTER..... I WANT SO SADNESS...... I WANNA ERASE ALL MA SUICIDAL THOUGHTS...... PLS SUME1... HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

ma life is a PRISON!!!!

2009-01-20T23:35:00.002+08:00

RELEASE ME SUMEBODY????

haiz..... wat else could i do with ma pathetic n miserable life.... im learning how 2 appreciate it but there's jus nothin 2 appreciate bout ma life.... its always da same.......

so 2day, did nothin much...... tht was until i received a call frm ma step-mom (whom jus gt discharged frm hospital) askin me to bring her stuff over 2 her mom's place as she will b staying thr till she's fine.......

so afta tht, took MRT, a thang tht i hate 2 do wen its crowded..... plus its peek hr.... gosh!!! imagine the sweaty armpits smell..... ewllllll!!!!! but luckily i didnt smell anythang funny...... thn waiting 4 da darn 123 bus is like waiting 4 an eternity...... da bus jus wouldnt come..... haiz....

thn reached thr n blah blah blah....... ma dad reached thr da same time i reached too..... hahas..... so thn after a while, ma father n i headed hme...... thn it began...... da LECTURE im talkin bout..... if he lecture bout edu, also NVM, i can stil handle it but this is bout RELIGION....... haiz......
ma father is like da spoil recorder, keeps repeating itself......

'appa': zainab, im gonna control wat u wearing already..... no more wearing of jeans..... u r showing ur body 2 the world....
(i was looking at wat i wore, a black tee n jeans..... i didnt even revealed anything.... well ma FAT ASS..... it was bulging out...... ohok... it was ma mistake....
me: pa, ni jeans aje.....
'appa': dunt tell/teach me...... i wasnt realli listening..... well whu does???
'appa': blah blah blah blah blah.......
thn he turned arnd (i was walking bhind him) n gave me a fierce look..... hmmm..... i wasnt realli afraid though.... hahahs... mcm phm je....

thru out the journey ( well mayb arnd 30) frm bukit purmei 2 jurong.... he talks bout religion..... ma dressing code..... da fact tht untill now, i dunt pray..... n HE EVEN TOLD ME THT I'LL SOON WEAR BAJU KURONG 2 ANY EVENTS...... whu is he kiddin??? n he even said tht he will b cnging me soon.....

ALL THIS THANKS 2 DA ONE PERSON IN THIS WHOLE WIDE WERLD (WWW) WHU HAS INFLUENCE MA DAD...... well ma kuzzies knw whu am i talkin bout.....

k, ppl... adiyos......
p/s..... i hate ma wireless thingy..... it always goes wrung at the rite time..... understnd???

sista or sista..... y do u leave me??? haiz....

2009-01-18T22:59:00.002+08:00

GOSH!!!! its been a long n tiring day 4 me........

chain of events.....

*woke up, still sleepy....
*helped cut ingredients for cooking, thn me together with ma maid cooked 2day's menu...
delicious n yummy chicken kicap n veggies (lady's finger n beans).... mmmmmm....
*amidst all this, ma step-mom was complaining of severe stomach pain.....
as u all knw, she is or i mean was pregnant...... so this really werried us.... n she was having her menses too...... pregnant woman should not have menses......
*pain gt really terrible n she was damn in pain.... moaning n crying..... weak.....
*ma dad, decided 2 call 4 an ambuance, coz she cant move...
*ambulance arrived, n GOSH!!! 1 of da male paramedic was sooo handsem.... hmmmm....
shameer was so excited wen da paramedics arrived.... ask me 101 questions.... i had 2 bury ma head.....
*i was very werried, they took ma step-mom 2 NUH..... daniyal followed in the ambulance while ma dad came bhind, driving his lorry...... me, ma maid, yas n shameer stayed at hme ferst....
*thn, afta an hr or so, ma dad called n asked us 2 go hospital....
*took a cab n went thr....

*arrived at hospital..... daniyal told me ma step-mom had a miscarriage..... i tot it was a joke, so i laughed......
*i onli realised it was'nt a joke, wen ma step-mom's mom told me......
*started crying, saw ma step-mom weeping over the loss of her child.....
*i cant stop crying, but i cried silently..... its so sad to lose a sibling..... haiz....
*ma maid cant stp crying too.....
*thn, went 2 see ma dead sibling......
i tot it was a male, but the nurse told me it was a female..... OMG!!! i lose my sister..... i saw the dead sister of mine.... onli 5 mths old..... skin was red, had eyes, nose.... legs n hand..... laying dwn thr motionless..... tht moment i can stp crying.......
*jus could'nt control this damn tears of mine..... keeps pouring dwn.....
*afta tht, ma aunties came..... talk, talk..... went 2 get a bite...... thn sha n kak moi, together with their parents came...... chat chat... thn all head hme.....

Now im bloggin...... still quite sad...... coz i lose a sister..... HAIZ..... this r all fated..... things like this do happen in life..... predestinied....... haiz...... so sad lahx.... pity ma dad..... n ma step-mom too.... she was sooo weak...... tomolow, will b seeing her.... hope everything will b alrite..... i still could'nt erase my sister image in ma eyes.....

haiz..... TC!!!!!

sorry!!!

2009-01-16T22:17:00.002+08:00

hie ma dearest readers,

sorry didnt post for a long time.... i simply jus didnt had the mood for an obvious reason coz i fail ma Os....

since ma Os, jus been pretty bz researching bout private diploma n deciding bout ma future... what has it in store 4 me??? is it a miserable pathetic life OR a happy wonderful life...

well jus have 2 wait patiently 4 it thn..... tomolow, mayb goin dwn 2 MDIS to enquire bout courses n stuff..... been getting a lot of positive response thru emails, 4 private diploma.... the thing tht im msot werried bout is $$$$$$$$$.....

well, im gonna start werkin soon... gonna lessen the burden on ma father.... jus pity him so much... afta the much dissapointments i have neen giving him.... 'APPA, im really very extremely sorry.... jus wait 4 tht very day, wen i bring glory 2 ur name.... i love u soo much.... n thanks 4 supporting me even though i failed ma Os.....'

jus wish i could tell him this personally... HAIZ..... y childrens always do this; they get their parents hope uh high n thn crush thm into tiny glass pieces.... god!!!!

things to do:

*go dwn MDIS, enquire bout the courses tht im elligible 4 a.s.a.p
*go n find werk a.s.a.p.... need n desperate 4 income......
*lessen ma father's burden
*achieve something in life, so tht ma father will b proud of me...
*shed some KGs.... coz getting too fat
*gonna hit the gym anytime soon.....
*do sumething with ma terrible hair.... mayb cut 'botak' hmmm.........

Gonna update soon... Those whu r werried 4 me, pld dunt b... im alrite now... n i'l soon make up ma decisions.... bye.... TC!!!!!

all dwn da drain..... ALL...... dissapointment

2009-01-12T18:28:00.002+08:00

k, ppl its official..... i FAIL......

I, ZAINAB IS DA WORLD BIGGEST LOSER..... I FAIL..... I FAILED TERRIBLY....... IM SO DISSAPOINTED IN MASELF...... ALL EFFORTS WENT DWN DRAIN....

HAIZ........ wat do i do??? whr do i go with such sucky results???? jus suxs.... im still crying..... i SOO HATE MASELF..... anotha great dissapointment (AGAIN) 4 ma dad....

GOSH!!!! so upset... cant stop crying..... hw am i gonna face ma relatives, kuzzins..... wunt they think im a loser n a big failure??? sha2 is so weried bout me so is kak naz n kak moi.... thanks loads 4 ur concerns..... realli appreciate it loads...

im stuck with only 1 elligible course..... tat course is early childhood edu..... i like tht course too..... but i realli want NURSING...... rite at this moment, i'll do anything 2 gt nursing......

some ppl tot i will do sumething foolish, which is half rite btw.... i realli feel like killin maself.... BUT im not a selfish person..... n i wanna treasure those ppl whu loves me.....

k, ppl... GTG.... face life.....
look 4 otha courses if not die......
feel like tearing ma Os result slip....
useless n worthless jus LIKE ME......
*y is this happening*????

ARGH!!!! ITS NEARING... JUS HRS AWAY!!!!

2009-01-11T23:29:00.002+08:00

OMG!!!!!

TOMOLOW, 2PM, QTSS....... Os results........

y does this needs 2 happen??? would'nt it b easier if afta exam, there will b no results..... haiz....

so scared but also excited coz gonna see ma results..... haiz i dunno lahx.... ma feelings r now mixed together in a blender....

see, wen im nervous, i dunno WTH am i typing........

gonna cut this post short..... coz too nervous to even type..... haiz.....

hope prayers can calm me down..... so tomolow 2 pm, i'll face da gallows...... wish me all da best....

TC!!!!

tiring day......

2009-01-10T11:59:00.002+08:00

OMG!!!! anotha two more days till ma O level results......*sighs*...

so ys'day, went 4 2 poly open hse...... it was SP n NP...... really informative but jus realli was'nt tht interested coz by looking at da courses cut off points jus left me speechless.....

so atlast went out wif aisha, annie, lina n jia wei....... lina, jia wei n annie were late.... so late.... aisha n i waited 4 em in Dover MRT station..... i was HOT, HUNGRY N MA LEG HURT, THANKS 2 THOSE DARN SHOES OF MA STEP MOM.....

saw a lot of extraordinary ppl..... ppl with 'unusual' hair color...... ppl with 'good' fashion sense.... n plainly jus weirdoS...... soon im gonna b like em.....

ferst went 2 SP..... so crowded.... saw tHESH frm FKB.... he is so small in person..... saw performance frm da indian society in SP.... nice dance but hate da sng.... it was MOZHA MOZHA frm KURUVI...... kak naz, if u r readin this, dunt laugh.....

afta tat went 2 NP...... GOSH!!!! da skool is soo big... it looked liked a housing estate..... there r even block numbers...... learnt bout da new courses.... n of course NURSING..... da cut off point was 28...... thn gt msg frm kak naz..... she was in NP too... hmmmm... wonder wat was she doin there??? most importanly whu was wif her??? wanted 2 meet her but ma fwends were tired so we went off...... actually wanted 2 ate lunch or mayb called it dinner coz it was arnd 6.....

suprisingly wasnt hungry eventhough i didnt ate lunch n breakfast.... all i ate was a packet of choco POCKY..... afta tat went hme returned kak moi book..... bought MAC 4 ma bro n me...... ma leg was hurting all da way frm SP till baq hme.... OUCH!!!

2day no plans yet.... jus browsing thru da brochures i got frm da open hse...... a lot of course..... i need 2 choose 12 or 13..... GOSH!!!! so many.... i onli have interest in nursing.... i dunt wanna nd up like kak moi..... she was in a course tht she dunt like...... i dunt wanna b like tht.....

k ppl, bye.....

OMG!!!! IT IS HERE!!!! ARGH!!!

2009-01-08T13:46:00.002+08:00

OMG!!!! DA NITEMARE HAS FINALLY ARRIVED......

its on da 12TH OF JANUARY........ MA Os results r gonna b released on this scary date....... its like soooo soon.....

so nervous n scared...... *cryin*...... i gt 2 knw this frm aisha whu heard da date on da news..... afta this date, no more laughter, happiness, fun n shiok times...... if i fail but i pass means party all da way....... but thts so nt gonna happened...... its like hearing ur death sentence....

i realli wanna pass or gt below 2o points...... if tht's gonna happened..... i hope i can pump in loads of confidence in maself...... haiz.......

k enuff bout da Os..... 2day woke up hell late n again i've 2 put up wif da darn loud noise of da constrution outside..... i seriously dunno wth r rhose ppl doin with da roads.... they r like drilin it, putting cement n again drilling it...... its sooo noisy n loud..... but i still can sleep..... i dunno hw..... i can sleep with da drilling sound + da cars horns + some stupid inconsiderate whu r shouting instead of talkin..... haiz....

tomolow i realli hope can go 2 da poly open hse with ma fwends...... realli hope evry1 can make it......

~ADIYOS~

its over n done with

2009-01-07T12:08:00.002+08:00

GOSH!!!! im so scared of da results.....
i heard rumours its coming out soon..... some says its on da 15th of JAN, but still nt conferm yet....

haiz...... so weried, scared but kinda of anxious too..... help me??? no confident of passing at all + i've been dreaming 4 da past mnths tht i will b failin ma Os..... BOO HOO HOO....... da dreams betta b da opposite......

4 da nxt few days, i'll b home alone coz ma bro went 4 his sec 3 camp..... oh..... i lurve ma sec 3 camp...... a lot of memorable things took place...... like wen i fall like a superwoman..... flying fox.... wen we(ma fwends n i) whu slept in da same hut or wadeva its called, were damn scared of ghost.... hahahahahaha...... those wonderful memories will always stick in ma mind n it will never b erase.......

so bored lahx..... jus cant wait on fri coz of da outing with ma fwends to poly open hses...... aisha betta go.......

so ys'day, ma father asked me if i wanted 2 rebond ma hair AGAIN....... i said no....
i tink im sick of always have 2 rebond ma hair...... if its curly thn i'll have 2 stick wif it..... n appreciate it...... n ma father told me tht ma hair is natural n its god creation so there's no need 2 rebond......

well i agree wif him..... its nt tht i dunt like ma hair, i lurve ma hair coz its unique n u rarely see it elsewhr but its jus tht hate it wen it gets all entangled n i hate 2 brush it coz its so rough..... ma hair kps on falling..... its realli destroyed..... i have no dandruff but i do have hair breakage, split ends n im gettin bald coz ma hair kps on falling..... + i have an itchy scalp but no dandruff...... i realli need 2 buy a suitable shampoo 4 ma hair..... i tink mayb im gonna buy ASIANCE OR CLEAR...... hmmmmm......

there r so many imperfectness in me..... jus too many flaws....... well after all no 1 is perfect...... or there r perfect ppl???? hmmm...... haiz..... in ma life instead of smiling n laughing more i ALWAYS SIGH....... SIGH..... SIGH..... N MORE SIGHS..........

so ys'day watched that's so raven season 2...... many of ma fav episodes.... i jus lurve wacthing tht show..... its damn hillarious n i dunt get tired of it...... ys'day was da plumber episode..... ma fav epi...... i m waiting 4 da talent episode.... coz tht is ma favourite......

this is 1 of ma fav sonf frm raven symone...... she is funny, good actor, funny, can sing n she dance very well too... oh n did i mentioned tht she was FUNNY????

enjoy peeps..... remember LAUGHTER IS DA BEST MEDICINE IN LIFE..... but dunt laugh too much coz ppl gonna think u r lunatic.....hahahhaha...... bye......

nothin much

2009-01-05T13:39:00.000+08:00

hie peepz......

stuck at hme AGAIN N BORED....... this fri i'll b goin out with fwends 2 da poly opn hse.... damn excited bout it.... cant wait..... atlast meeting ma fwends, ANNIE, LINA, JIA WEI N OF COURSE MA BESTIE AISHA.......

Gosh miss them a lot..... i wonder hw will our fwendship b if we go to poly, or anywhere else afta Os result...... haiz..... jus knw tht im gonna miss thme so much...... coz no 1 on this earth can replace ma fwends..... mayb some of it whu r nt close to me but 4 da rest- nope, no 1 on this earth........

btw annie, lina n jia wei + da rest of their fwends r goin 2 genting 2day.... i guess they must have reached there by now...... jus hope they have tons of fun over there like i did...... n i hope they have a safe trip baq........

so ys'day was watchin HELLO V on vasantham central...... lurve tht show.... most importantly lurve da host-VADIVALAGAN...... he is jus soo funny...... i was totally amazed by da story he told.... so there he was in INDIA n bought sumething, im nt sure frm a guy whu was missing 1 hand.... VADI told over da shw tht eventhough tht guy was missing 1 hand, he was nt sad.... in fact he was happy with whu he is...... eventhough with his disability, he still strives 4 his own living was very much contented with his life....... n thn VADI said, tht guy eventhough with sucha condition, was very happy n jovial in life unike otha ppl whu r vey much blessed in life but sets off with a gloomy face thinking tht y their life suxs so much instead of smiling n welcoming evryday n starts it off rite.......

i suddenly related tht 2 maself...... well i m like tht..... i always think ma life suxs...... i jus hate ma life completely...... everything tht revolves arnd me jus totally suxz big time..... eventhough im healthy n is blessed with a good family n helpful n generous relatives, i jus dunno how 2 appreciate life..... y??? i simply dunno..... i guess human-beings r like tht.....

but i do realli wanna chng...... its jus tht i dunno wen??? haiz......

btw sowie ppl, i knw ma past few entries have been bout crapz..... but i jus wanna share with da readers of ma blog....

so 2day, nothin much..... jus ate ma breakfast or shall i say lunch???? later jus gonna do some house chores n later at 21:00 pm sharp, im gonna stick ma butt 2 ma sofa n hope any1 do no disturb me coz 2day is da last episode of ma fav drama LITTLE NYONYA.......

ya pppl, i DO watch chi drama..... coz they r damn nice 2 watch n especially with jeanette aw acting in those dramas, da more i watch them......

bye n tc!!!!!!

new bloggy.... whoo cool.....

2009-01-04T23:25:00.000+08:00

what do i say??? what do i say???

I JUST LURVE MA NEW BLOG..... LURVE DA SKIN COZ ITS SIMPLE N NICE...... LURVE DA SNG COZ ITS MA CURRENT FAV N LURVE DA VID COZ I LIKE TAT SNG TOO EVENTHOUGH ITS KINDA OLD SNG..........

of course all this couldn't have happened without da great help frm SHARENA BEGUM!!!!!
thanks so much gerl.... lurve ur taste in blogskins.... u jus knw wats rite 4 me.... lurve u...... again thanks a ZILLION.......

btw i did attempt 2 chnge ma own blogskin but it went disastorous...... i guess i still do need help frm da PRO-SHARENA BEGUM!!!! i've gotta master it soon.... coz i dunt wanna trouble her again 2 chnge ma blogskin...... well i jus dunno wen will i master it???? hmmmm........

2day, well anotha boring day in ma life-as usual..... AGAIN nothin extraordinary happened...... jus tht i helped ma maid in da cooking...... i helped in cleaning da darn small squids tht ma 'APPA' wrungly bought...... i tink it took an eternity b4 i finished it..... well i didnt finished it but i did helped cleaned 3/4 of it...... 2 think those squids r so damn small..... afta tat, i had a disgusting task of washing ma hands n getting rid of da YUCKY smell off....... i tink i finished off da whole bottle of hand soap but da smell jus wouldn't get off..... its jus too stubborn-well like me.....

afta tat, eat n chat n eat n watch TV..... played game..... dunt wery im nt a game addict, its jus 4 time pass..... n bsides da game is damn interesting n fun 2 play...... u guys shld try it.... its on miniclips.com...... jus click on puzzle games n search 4 da scruffs.... its realli a nice game..... afta tat, brought ma broZ, yas n shameer 2 da playgrnd..... played with em..... if u guys felt any vibration 2day, tht's probably me coz i was RUNNING....... sowie.... hehehehe...... thn sent them hme.... oh n ya, tomolow is SHAMEER'S FERST DAY IN PRE-SKOOL....... i dunno hw is he gonna b in pre-skool... i hope he jus dunt follow ma steps in bullying da children..... yup peepz, i was A BIG N MEAN BULLY in pre-skool days...... shockin aite??? well i did had ma wild days....

afta tht, send them off 2 their grandma's crib..... now bloggin n chatting.... oh ya n btw i have 2 new nn.....

SARA HAND LICKER(SHL)
KUNTIL QUEEN(KL)

thankz 2 kak naz..... i guess im realli proud of maself coz i have hell loads of nn.....

*foxygal
*foxylyke
*zaishine
*pumperzai
*SHL
*KQ
*sri lankan
well tht's boout it...... quite a num huh??? i tink i shld add more 2 da list.... mayb da nxt 1 shall b NIGGA ZAI???? hmmmmm........

hahahahahhaaha..... k peepz adiyos....... btw anotha huge thanks 2 ma best kuzzie, SHARENA BEGUM 4 her help in ma blogskin... lurve u..... MUACKZ!!!!!

2009......

2009-01-03T14:23:00.000+08:00

haiz....... again stuck at hme wif some crazy siblingz of mine....... 'tk lame lagik, dh ade lagik satu'.....

i realli hope its a gerl..... jus finished reading da pprz..... everytime i read da pprz, its always da same old news of wars, crimes n more unstability of countries...... wen will there b werld peace???? haiz..... sumetimes its jus so sad 2 read all this news but i jus cant help it..... i wanna knw wats goin on in this werld.....

read A news bout an infant, whose legs got bit n chewed off by a wild dog...... n 1 more thing da infant is abandoned by its own mother..... whenever i read this type of news, i'll b reminded of ma own life.... wen ma mother left me n ma bro wif ma father...... afta divorce, she did come 2 visit us but thn dunno 4 wat reasons she jus stopped.... till nw i dunno wats da real reason she left me n ma bro..... ma bro was sill young..... btw i was arnd 4 or 5 n ma bro was 1 or 2..... young huh???? but i still did grew up properly of ourse thanks 2 ma dad..... or shall i call him ma 'APPA'.... tats wat i address him.... i lurve ma dad but i tink he jus did a HUGE mistake of re-marrying..... i jus dunno y...... if he didnt re-marry, it will b onli me, ma bro n ma 'appa' 4 da rest of our lives..... wouldnt it b great??? i dunno.... but i jus terribly missed those moments wen ma 'appa', me n ma bro jus sat together happilly n watched POPEYE happilly..... laughing together...... i jus realli missed those moments......

hw i wish, i cld turn baq da clock 2 return baq 2 these golden moments.... i miss them...... realli miss them...... wen will i gt those moments baq???? haiz...... ok enuff of ma past.... coz they r never gonna return.....

2day, woke up hell late at 11:30..... luckily ma father's not at hme if nt he'll scream at me...... afta tat jus looking afta ma bro n i've 2 listened 2 da noises frm da construction....... SO NOISY..... i can go mad listening 2 it...... headache sia....... its still goin on now..... all da drilling + da cars + ma siblings noise...... ARGH!!!!! 'bleh jadik gile sak'........

k peepz, gtg...... MUACKZ......

2008-12-31T17:13:00.000+08:00

MORE PICS...... ENJOY......

im baq....

2008-12-31T14:35:00.000+08:00

miss me peeppzz....... OH COME ON jus admit it..........

well im baq n goin fatter...... more fats has been added on by me...... whu woudnt???? after all, all da food i ate 4 da trip is FOC...... kindly paid by ma uncle...... or shall i call him SB??

well wat do i say??? where do i start??? there's jus tons n tons of stuffs 2 talk bout..... so many things happened..... all sweet stuffs...... i simply jus enjoyed it SO much..... all ma kuzzies, ma both aunts n ma uncle trested me so well n fed me enuff too.... they even gave me $$$$$ for shopping purposes....... THEY R JUS DA BEST PPLZ ON EARTH..........

Departure

- 1 day b4 goin, slept 1 day at kak naz ouz coz we were goin off in da wee hrs of morning....

-woke up at 5:30 a.m. onli brush teeth.... dunt wery we bath in da nite..... so we didnt stink....

-took a big white van n it was kinda of squeezy at da baq coz 4 of us which is me, ma bro, sha2 n da little 1 mehrin was sitting rite at da baq.....

-had fun during our journey..... listened 2 music n joked arnd.... oh n nt 4gettin, RAUF ma littlest kuzzie followed too.....

Genting Highland

-reached there arnd 2 or 3....

-i was kinda of scared wen we were goin up da slopes or wadeva it was b4 reachin da genting hotel.....

-well da darn driver was SO DAMN slow.... many cars passed us.....

-reached there n it was DAMN cold..... was shivering even wearing sweaterz...

-checked in n we didnt even rest coz too excited 4 da thrill ridez.....

-it was soo foggy there... we cant even see some rides......

-we started with some slow rides ferst but 4 me it wasnt slow.... it was scary n fun....

-kak moi n me were afraid 4 some of da rides...

-sha2 on the otha hand was sick n didnt wanna take some otha rides with us......

-all da thrill rides was AWESOME, FUN N SUPER SHIOK MAN!!!!

(jus cant find werds 2 describe da wonderful feelings i had)

-but i tink da most fun 1 was da SPACESHOT or wadeva it is called......

(OMG!!!!! peepz this 1 is a realli life-taker...... it was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SHIOK LIKE DAMN SHIOK........ i was so afraid da ferst time round but i couldnt resist it da second time.... took da SHIOK, SUPER SHIOK ride TWICE!!!!)

-but i was realli sad wen i couldnt play da roller coaster coz it was closed due to da bad weather........ boo hoo hoo!!!!!

-tat was it on da ferst day... afta da rides, had dinner.......

second day:

-we were prepared 4 da indoor parks....... which was da SCREAM PARK.....

-shouted like crazy in da haunted ouz n da theme was werewolf...... all i knw is tat i shouted like 1 mad woman n it was scary too.....

-went 2 da RIPLEY'S exihbition..... damn interesting..... in there i was like; what??? u can do tht???? whu??? huh???? interesting...... plain dumb-founded 4 some exihbition..... its jus so interesting n informative......

-took a small roller coaster indoors.... it was ok lahx.....

-went to da snow city... its already cold n we went into an even colder place..... ma muccus froze in there.... ya i knw, veri disgusting.... n i went dwn da slope n hurt ma butt...... damn pain kayz....

-n guess wat, wen it was on da second day- da weather 4 outdoor ridez were clear n fine..... haiz..... we regretted goin on da ferst day itself.....

-took a lot of pics n some vids too......

(i'll post da pic once, i get it)

-thn off in anotha van 2 SUNWAY LAGOON...

(this time da driver was so much faster n i was comfortable too......)

OVERALL ON GENTING HIGHLAND:

*fun n shiok

*never take da roller coaster 4 outdoor (SOBS)

*btw we (kak naz, kak moi, me n sha2) slept on da floor in da hotel room as they was no more bed 4 us..... but it was comfortable enuff sleeping on da comforters...... but da comfortors n sweaterz did nt help me fight against da cold weather....

*da weather even though was cold but da view was realli nice.... foggy......

*almost lost ma voice coz of screams 4 da rides n da haunted ouz......

*hurt ma butt but still had fun....

*cant go 2 toilet properly n ya ma foot hurt a lot.... i tink it was due 2 da cold weather tht i wasnt much prepared 4........

*btw i 4get 2 mentioned tht i went da trip with ma kuzzie..... n also both ma aunts n uncle......

kuzziez

kak naz (nazreen) her parents were da sponsors or was it her father??? well both were great..... 'peremah' n 'perepaa' a.k.a SB....... but he was damn nice n happening too n funny also..... 'peremah' mcm biace so small n i was kinda of envying her wen she was half naked in da hotel... NO no DUNT GT ME WRUNG!!! i was admiring her bod which is damn small n cute actualli... she is actualli hot 4 women her age....

kak moi (ramija) her mom also gave me $$$$$$.... a.k.a caci jija...... she is always hot..... no need 2 mention bout tht...... but nw she is rather religious.... well gd 4 her......

nawas

i.k.i (iqram)

daniyal (ma bro)

sha2 (ma best kuzzie)

mehrin (da annoying n youngest female kuzzie)

abdul rauf (youngest kuzzie 2 date n da cutest)

SUNWAY LAGOON

-reached there n checked into a super nice hotel..... i heard tht it was 4**** hotel

-food was damn nice.....

-went to sunway.... ferst b4 getting wet, went into da scream park n it was hell scarier thn genting 1......

-da prison break was damn fun..... da 'ghost' was supposed 2 b prisoners....... da lite in da place was continously flickering n it was kinda of hard to see...... all i knw was tht sha2 was so scared n i was helding on tighly to kak moi....... we were all so scared....... screaming was wat we onli knew......

-thn came da swimming part......

-i was so 'malu' 2 wear ma tights n t-shirt coz there were humanz everwhere...... n some were so fat n even still daring 2 wear bikini.... i jus gave them 'da look'.....

-ma n kak moi was so scared at ferst 2 go dwn da slides but we later enjoyed ourselves.......

-we went 2 a pool where they had live music on... but da DJ was sooo boring...... sometimes da sngs were nice n sometimes it was so boring.......

-kak naz n kak moi requested 4 tempted 2 touch sng...... n we dance like crazy, enjoying ourselves n shaking our bods 2 da tune..... we even had a signature dance move 4 da sng..... NICE......

-we also 'kena kacau' by da m'sia indians...... damn gross sia....... n i realised tht m'sia had so many indians...... everywhere i turn is an indian....

-saw some fighting couples n saw some disgusting couples...... but ma fav was da fighting couple coz da woman was shouting 'chodo muche chodo'...... with her chudiya.... it was so hillarious.......

afta all tht.... went baq to hotel feeling damn exhausted but happy...... da nxt day was booked 4 shopping...... we went to KLCC... but i didnt bought stuff there coz it was so EXPENSIVE...... n sumething interesting n funny happened....

A NASI KANDAR MAN HAD A CRUSH ON KAK MOI....... he was grinnig n staring at da beautiful kak moi all da time wen we were eating......... so i had a new nn 4 her, ms kandar...... hahahahahahahaha.......... so funny....... if onli her bf was there.......

afta all shopping, i bought some stuff too coz we went 2 anotha place where things were much more cheaper..... but tht place do not have much variety...... but i did manage 2 but some stuff..... board bus n said GOODBYE 2 m'sia...... reached s'pore arnd 12:30 a.m on wed morning..... n it was a sad moment 4 me as we had to part our ways........ i had 2 return baq to ma same sickening life......

GONNA MISS:

disturbing i.k.i with ma ama-ama-ama-ama-ama...... he gets so annoyed wen i do tht...... hahahahaha.......

gonna miss ma sri lankan partner n ms kandar, kak moi......

kak naz n her humorous ways......

sha2 screams in da scream parks.....

nawas n his blur face.....

ma bro.... oh wait im nt gonna miss him........ never..... coz we both live in da same ouz.....

rauf...... so cute lahx.....

SB.......

both caciz whu r damn nice n hot.....

mehrin whu is annoying n cute at da same time.......

fun times n jokes i had in m'sia......

WELL AFTER ALL, ALL GOOD THINGS MUST COME 2 AN END!!!!!!!!

now baq at hme n blogging....... jus awaiting 4 ma Os patiently...... n also da new year....... listening to some great sngs too......... linking some new peepz on ma blog...... aisha ma bestie, finally has a blog.....

JUS WISHING EVERY1 IN ADVANCE A HAPPY NEW YEAR....... WELCOME 2009 WITH OPEN HEARTS N ALSO EMBRACE EVER1 WITH LOVE...... SPREAD JOY N LAUGHTER KAYZ...... LET BYGONES B BYGONES........ 4GIVE N 4GET....... ya i knw its easier saying thn doin.... but jus try kayz........ gonna miss 2008..... has loads of cries n joy in 2008......

bye..... gonna upload some pics........

xmas day....

2008-12-25T13:50:00.001+08:00

WISHING EVER1 A MERRY X'MAS

so fast its gonna b end of da yr...... time jus moves in a blink of an eye doesnt it???? it seems jus like ys'day, tht i was welcomin 2008 n now 2009 comin in jus few days......

im nt da kind of person whu does resolutions n follow it...... i dunno y???? so weird..... but i guess many otha ppl r nt following their own resolutions too aite???? its jus tht u wish 2 do sumethin great but ends up doin sumethin stupid or end up doin a whole different thing..... jus wondering y things like tht do occurs????

2day stuck at hme with parents too..... movies on TV r all so boring n i've ever watched b4.... but on da cinemas r different.... there r so many great mvie tht i wanna catch but BOO HOO no $$$$....... i was supposed 2 catch Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi...... heard tht is was a great movie.... now im listening 2 da sngs.... damn nice....... but ma fav is Dance Pe Chance.....

above is just bitz of da sng.......

realli cant wait 4 da trip which is like on sat..... but on fri nite i'll b sleepin at kak naz's hse..... so da nxt time i;ll b bloggin is perhaps in a wks time...... SO DUNT MISS ME........ bye......

xmas day....

2008-12-25T13:50:00.000+08:00

MERRY X'MAS..... HO HO HO!!!!!!!

bloo bloo bloo....

2008-12-24T15:14:00.000+08:00

wassup ppplz......

thankfully ma fever has gone away but im still kinda sick, tx 2 ma stuid flu n i hate nose blocks....
i wanna enjoy maself fully b4 i face da music 4 ma Os..... time r flying n days r practically movin darn fast.....

have been receiving loads of poly mail..... its scaring me.... coz i dunno if i can go into poly in da ferst place.... ARGH!!!!!! so scared....... so tormenting....... such a misery in jus waitin 4 resultz....
but i think im gonna put tht thought away 4 a while, well mayb till afta i enjoy ma trip 2 GENTING N KL......

cant wait 4 da thrill rides n splash..... ma flu betta get well by thn......

well tomolow is xmas......
jus wanna wish ever1 a HAPPY CHRISTMAS DAY!!!!! N ENJOY IT!!!!
remember this day is 4 celebrating fun n nothin otha thn that...... this is specially 4 ma fwendz whu celebrates xmas...... 4 da rest whu dunt jus enjoy ur public holiday......

im currently listening 2 sume britney spears hits...... well she's baq n looking darn great.... im nt realli a big fan of hers but i do support her powerful comebaq..... now im kinda of a fan of LADY GAGA..... her style is so unique n so is her songs n voice..... i lurve poker face(song)

this is a vid of just dance.... anotha hit of hers..... enjoy........
astala vista!!!!!

its been veri long......

2008-12-22T10:22:00.000+08:00

peepz..........

baq frm a very AWESOME N DAMN NICE N FUN sleepover........ had tonnes of fun......

wed:

*kak moi, cldn't come 4 tat day sleepover coz still sick....

*played game where u need 2 sing s rock song n there will b a drummer n guitarist......

as usual, i lost da game coz i dunno hw 2 sing da sng..... but da game was fun n interesting..... sha2 sang paramore sng n it was nt bad at all......

*went 2 da VCD shop 2 gt some horror flicks.....

*watched SUSUK n 4BHIA........

SUSUK was all rite.... it was'nt tat scary except 4 da parts where there were chicken flying...... da best movie was 4BHIA.... it was damn scary when it reached da second stry onwards...... da 4th story was da best of all......

*nite time, whn 2 lepak on da top level of da carpark...... damn shiok.....

thur:

*had a 4 hr sleep b4 waking up tiredly 2 go 2 ICA 4 ma passport.....

ATLAST had ma passport done..... huge thnks 2 ma uncle n of course kak naz n sha2 4 accompaniying me....

*met kak moi at cathay (i tink so) n went 2 watch YES MAN with her n da otha kuzziez......

i rate this movie 4 starz..... coz da movie which is a JIM CARREY starrer was damn hillarious.... i tink ever1 shld watch it..... i tink if i started 2 say YES in everytink i wanna do in life, ma life will b fun n at da same time haywire.....

*afta tat, hangout at ESPLANANDE..... played some guessing game..... wrote msg on a ball 4 NEW YEAR..... soon it will float on da waters of ESPLANADE... n ya, sume1 took photo of sha2 with da ball..... i hope they display it largely......

*went hme......

fri:

*went 2 help ma aunt at her shop.... me n sha2..... gt paid kayz........

*afta tat gt baq n xtended ma sleepover till sat.....

*watched TOMB n 1 MISSED CALL......

da TOMB was nunsence a lot, 1 missed call was ok......

* thn hangout AGAIN at carpark arnd 4......

played truth n dare with kuzziez..... had 2 reveal loads of dirts...... trust me, i was da werst of all......

sat:

*tot, could survive da whole morning but fail, took a 2 hrs nap b4 heading 2 hougang mall...
*went baq, gt thorough scolding frm dad...... (well, i kinda of deserve it)

4 da rest of da day till 2day.....

im dwn with on/off fever.... ma throat hurts a lot.... ma head is spinning..... im sweating coldly..... ARGH!!!!! hw terrible, cld ma life evr b........

so 2day, jus went 2 picked up ma passport n trust me, it was nt worth da $$$70 AT ALL!!!! so now im kinda of battling ma sickness n chatin with ma crazy kuzziez....

n peepz, its no more thailand, no more bali...... its OFFICIALLY GENTING N KL.......

YEAH!!!! its gonna b hell LOADS of fun.... n i cant jus wait........ sunway lagoon n haunted hse..... here i come......

BYE!!!

YAHOO!!!!!

2008-12-16T14:35:00.000+08:00

YO PEEPZ.........

so YS'day ma dad says YES 2 da thailand trip that i will b goin with ma kuzziez on sun( i tink so)........ wen dad says YES, anotha probz arise, which is ma passport...... i need 2 chng da pic coz i look TOOOOO cute in it..... NO LAHX, coz i look different n i've been given 2 warnings bout it.......

n jus 2 chng da pic it cost a fucking amnt of $70!!!!!! its like so expensive..... cos wen i cng da pic, i've 2 chng da whole passport too....... so now im realli damn worried bout it..... next bout da sleepover, i asked da SCAPEGOAT, well ma bro 2 ask ma dad.....

so it goes.........

thosei(ma bro): pa, i ngan akka lehx gi umak kak naz on wed 2 fri utk sleepover????

dad(appa):4 wat????
(me lookin damn worried n hoping 4 da best)

thosei: appa, bleh ah..... wed till fri je????
(me still prayin n hopin 4 da best)

dad: we'll discuss it later

actualli da convo was longer thn this, but i wanna make it short n sweet 4 ma faithful readerz, WELL SHA2...... but da gd thingy is ma bro says its a good omen wen ma dad says "we'll discuss it later"...... so jus hopin 4 da best......

so 2day, woke up at 11:30 n i cancelled da ouing with sha2 coz damn LAZY!!!! jus finished watchin TV n saw some great n interesting show.....
watched crime series on DISCOVERY CHANNEL, tats rite peepz, i DO watch DISCOVERY CHANNEL..... its bout a case where da victim's own hubby killed her 4 $$$$$$$..... not anything new aite????
*MONEY IS DA ROOT OF ALL EVIL*

so now jus lazyin at hme n bloggin.... cant wait 4 tomolow coz da sleepover..... n of coz on sun 4 da THAILAND trip.....
so i guess da nxt time i'll b bloggin is mayb nxt week........

till thn DUNT MISS ME KAYZ..... BYEZ N MAKE PRAY 4 MA WELL-BEING!!!!!
hahahahahahahahaha...........

nothin 2 say.....

2008-12-15T12:44:00.000+08:00

hey there.......

AGAIN stuck at hme n weirdy i m staring ma face in da mirror...... jus thinkin hw much UGLY cld i ever b!!!!!

dunt even get me started.....

*ma hair which is a mixture of damn curly n straight hair..... n its damn frizzy, haywire n dry..... n i think im goin bald soon coz ma hair is always fallin.....

*den its ma small beady eyes, which i cant even see wen i laugh.....

*ma big n 'kembang' nose.....

*ma lips....... nah, i lurve ma lips......

*den its ma complexion, well im dark but i LURVE IT, its jus that i've this white spots on it n its called da 'panau'..... its so hard 4 me 2 put on make-up.....

*n there's this thing on ma face which is called da 'kuntil' or wadeva shit.... its jus makin ma face more horrible.....

i knw. i knw. you guys must b thinkin tht i dunt appreciate da looks tht GOD has given me.... well basically i jus dunno hw 2 appreciate it coz im jus plain UGLY.......
n ma bod is gettin fatter n fatter as days pass by.... im addin on fats, loadz of it...... HAIZ!!!!!

ok, enuff of ma lookz n bod..... lets talk bout ma life..... hmmmmmmmmm...... i dunt think anything extraordinary happened..... its still da same in ma life.....

weekendz had ma broz over..... so noisy lahx them..... 'ni je tk lehx tahan, nanti nk tambah lagik satu'...... haiyoh.... 'mampoz lahz aku'....... ma lappie is a bit no actualli a lot kuku...... so irritatin..... da internet like sooooo damn lack.....

realli cant wait 4 da sleepover!!!!! so EXCITED!!!!
k, astala vista......
oh n ya jus wanna wish ma kuzzie, kak moi..... GET WELL SOON!!!!!

its been long........

2008-12-12T12:24:00.000+08:00

OMG!!!! its been ages since i blog....... (actualli, its onli been a week)..... but that's kinda of long aite?????

aniways had LOADS of fun 4 da past 1 week..... its been sleepovers n hangin out n doin a lot of crazy stuffs......

so i've got TONS n TONS n TONS n TONS 2 write bout.......

i hit da gym last fri or sat (i cant remember wen)....... so hit da gym with ma bro, kuzzies (kak moi n sha2)..... had loads of fun..... sha2 n i made a fool of ourselves when we warm up in da wrung place..... n it was onli later that we knw that gym had a place 4 us 2 warm up....... all da peepz in there must b thinkin that we r dumb fools..... hee...hee.....
da gym was very nice actualli but no HOT guys........ so never washed ma eyes there....... after gym, we headed straight baq 2 ma hme...... so we WALKED n WALKED n WALKED 2 go baq hme...... it was SOOOOO far n ma legs was aching painfully...... afta that, went 2 swensens..... of course i did'nt fork out da $$$$$$, it was ma aunt's treat (kak moi's mom).......
i knw u guys must b thinkin that WTH r we doin in swensens afta goin 2 gym???? well what do u knw..... da calories i lost in da gym was quickly regained baq at swensens...... coz i had a sumptous dinner of cookis n cream milkshake n fish n chips....... afta that, we went walking arnd BPP....... since it was already late 4 me n bro 2 head hme, we stayed da nite at ma aunt's hse....
we were bout 2 b realli damn happy but ma FATHER sent YASSIN over 2 ma aunt's place..... all fun was over..... ma aunt n kuzzie (kak moi) said that he was a good boy n I WAS LIKE WTH!!!!! yassin???? gd boy???? ya rite...... so sleepover 4 2 days..... we watched movies n ate N ate........

HARI RAYE HAJI

was at hme wen it was hari raye haji...... wore baju kurong which is da almost same colour as kak moi..... thn sumethin unexpected happened...... i took da lift with sha2's old flame...... but nothin happened lahx... he was so silent...... so i didnt bother much.......
that nite slept at sha2's ouz...... had LOADS of fun......

series of events that happened:

*al haj n his sis joined us 4 sleepover.......
*watched some vids......
*thn i slept 4 a while
*arnd 2, we sneaked out of da ouz...... (this was damn fun)
*thn we went 2 da pool n played with d water......
*afta that we settled dwn under sha2's void deck n
WE HAD AN ENCOUNTER WITH A GHOST CALLED DA POCONG!!!!!!!! HORRIFYIN MUCH.......
afta da al-haj n ma bro saw da pocong which was meters bhind me, we rushed 2 da lift but sumethin funny happened there.... da lift was at level1 but we couldnt see da inside of it..... so we climbed da darn stairs 2 level5 n took nda life there...... SCARY MUCH????? but da experience was FUN.....

thn afta tat, i still had a few more days of sleepover at sha2's ouz.... had loads of fun n blah blah blah!!!! that was untill ma dad called me n scolded me (AGAIN)........ at sha2's ouz, she n me didnt sleep untill da wee hours of morning..... but still again it was damn fun.......

now baq at hme..... baq 2 boredom n sickening life......

fun n weird things that happened 2 me:

* played with da most cutes bby on earth, ma kuzzie rauf......

*had LOADZ of fun with ma kuzzie, kak moi n sha2 n ma bro , THOSEI......

* heard news that an uncle of mine is being a nosey n reading peepz blog...... hmmmmmm.........

*POCONG

*sha2's old flame.....

* n da fact that i sat on my kuzie (iqram) shoulder...... i hope he nevr broke his shoulder......

*did somw quiz with sha2.......

sleepy.......

2008-12-04T12:51:00.000+08:00

PEEPZZ.....

wassup???? i knw that i still damn bored lahx..... im sowie evry1.... i knw most of da content in ma blog always bout me bein bored..... but wat 2 do????

i cant deny da fact that IM FUCKING BORED.......
shortly later goin to JP, not 4 shopping but goin 2 da NTUC 2 gt some things 4 later cooking.... i've 2 cook 4 ma bro.... n seriously i dunno WTH 2 cook... so i tot of doin ma maid recipe which is 'kicap ayam' n mayb gonna do pistachio chocolate fudge if i have da time but most importantly wen im not lazy.... hee... hee.....

so Ys'day had a long insane chat (AGAIN) with ma bestie..... this time she was laughin like a whore...... hahahahahaha......*no offence*......
midst talkin had some irritating interuptions by ma asshole bro..... childish much!!!!
oh ya n Ys'day (AGAIN) had anotha dream, this tyme is was ma bestie (AGAIN).......
but she didnt came pregnant, she came with a new haircut n i saw her under ma old block n she was'nt wearing 'tudong'.....
funny huh????
i dunno wht's wrung with ma dreamoz......

k peepz, BYE!!!

blah blah blah

2008-12-03T12:37:00.000+08:00

YO, YO, YO!!!!!
damn bored at hme.....
was supposed 2 go out with ma kuzzie 2 go buy her sch books but plan cancelled...... HAIZ!!!!

jus sitting at hme n watching some awesome movies.....
2day had weird dreamz AGAIN....... jus 2 weird 2 describe it.......
went 2 read otha peepz blogz.....

now bz doin some great n interesting quizzes bout maself....
is realli fun....

so thn i did an intersting quiz on whicch reptile should i b n.........
I WILL B A LIZARD........( a animal which i despise da most n if i see it i'll turn into a violent murderer)
COZ......

You are intuitive and sensitive. You pay close attention to your subconscious and your dreams.You embrace your fears and the darker side of life.It's easy for you to be detached and objective when you need to be.You are able to let go easily. You don't get attached to much. And considering how often you change course, people shouldn't get too attached to you.

this was da reason that i will b a lizard if i were a reptile......
but seriously peepz, i dunt realli blieve in all this quiz..... sometimes it doo says real facts bout me but most of da timez it doesnt......

k, peepz, BYE.....

siCKO....

2008-12-01T17:02:00.000+08:00

bored, bored n plain BORED!!!!!!
stuck at hme..... plans onli on wed..... tat also accompaniying ma best kuzzie, SHARENA, go buy books......
tats fun huh, 4 an outing...... well atleast tats betta thn stayin at hme n fattening maself....

2day tat idiotic bro of mine, YASSIN, is not at hme.... so much betta.... less irritating..... atlast ma bro n ma prayers had been answered..... ALHAMDULLILAH....... nothin much 2 mention bout ma life...... same old boring stuff.....

just having a lot of weird dreamz this past few days..... on fri nite, i dreamt that ma bestie, NOORAISHA, was pregnant!!!! it was jus sooo weird..... in ma dream, she came 2 me n was pregnant.... n wen i ask her whu's da baby's father, she said it was ZUL.... a guy in our class..... i was shocked.... n so i attended her wedding n blah blah blah...... n anotha weird thing was tat one of ma distant relative was in ma dream...... so weird siak.....
da otha weird dreamz, couldnt recall tat much.... onli could remember this very vividly......

Ys'day, ma dad asked me 2 watch ma maid do da cookin n he asked me 2 learn..... its not tat i dunno how 2 cook.... most of da dish i can cook... its jus tat im plain lazy.... tats all..... n Ys'day, dunno wats wrung with ma dad, he keeps on emphasising bout da importance of eating healthily......
i mean its realli good but he was jus 2 much.... it was sooo unlike him..... but i guess he learnt his lesson afta much illness...... n he doesnt wants us 2 follow his footsteps.... (us- ma siblingz).....

i guess life is sumetimez short 4 pplz.... gotta enjoy it happily n at da same time healthily too..... k peepz.... gotta go.... jus cont ma boring life n later watching ma fav chi drama.....

tERRIBle......

2008-11-27T15:41:00.000+08:00

hey....
its been two freakin days since i update ma bloggy....

wed-
nothin unusual happened..... same all borin n pathetic life goin on.....
stuck at hme with ma irritating n idiotic bro, YASSIN.....
me n DANIYAL (ma bro 2oo) have been praying all day so that that sickening YASSIN can go baq 2 his gramdma's ouz......
'menyibuk sak dier kat umah'......
We really hope our prayers will b answered.....
but at nite had a long insane chat with ma bestie NOORAISHA.....
talk bout crapz.... n she was laughing like a slut.....
hahahahahaha...... no offence......

2day-
jus finish cooking sambal hotdog n rasam.....
da sambal was nice 4 me, edible but i tink i put 2oo many chillies.....
rasam, on da otha hand was a bit 2oo sour.....
but still can swallow......
ma step-mom has been ordering me 2 wash clothes, dry em n do otha stuff.....
NVM, i'll jus b patient coz she's expecting......
now i can spill da beanz coz i guess many ppl knw bout it already......
all must b wondering that ma father, 'stress2, pon sempat main'.......
i seriously dunno what's ma life gonna b.....
4now i jus keep hopin that ma father will stay strong no matter wat happens n i will jus cont 2oo b patient......
still gt household chores 2 do.....
thn later gt ma fav chi drama, starring jeanette aw.....
i hope i spell it correctly..... da drama is awesome n i simply lurve her acting since HOLLAND V, where she play as 'jingjing' da blur sotong.....

i guess 2molow, i'll change ma skin n ma sng.....
of coz with da help of ma kuzzie SHARENA..... (im new with all this stuff)
GOSH!!!! I REALLY WANNA GO OUT BUT NO $$$$$$.....
bye peepz.....

boRED N PLain bOREd.....

2008-11-25T16:26:00.000+08:00

hie.........

realli been damn bored..... slacking at hme, continuos (oh, my.... i dunno hw 2 spell this werd) lecture frm ma dad..... AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN N A AGAIN!!!!! he realli does'nt knw wen 2 stp..... GOSH!!!!! i realli need a job coz im desperate 4 $$$$$$...... im broke!!!!!

i dunno y, tis past few days, im realli not maself.... i dunno if im nt feelin well or jus feelin damn bored stuck at hme..... i realli miss NOORAISHA.... if in skool, she was ma laughin companion...... now at hme if i laugh out maself, ma broz think im lunatic...... jus finish helping ma step-mom cook.... 2day, she's at hme.... she's sick n never go werk.... her son, YASSIN, is taking in-charge of the TV n he watch nothin else thn he's stupid cartoonz..... 'menyibuk je, tnggal kat sini.... gi lahx alik umah nenek dier'......

wanna go watch movies, NO $$$$$$!!!!! im realli sick n tired of ma daily life routine..... its so sickening.... now listening 2 some great songz frm vaaranam ayiram.... i realli wanna go watch da movie..... ARGH!!!!! BORED!!!!! later wen ma dad comes hme, AGAIN, kene lecture y i never cook, watch TV only..... thn now gotta help ma step-mom with da household chores..... Whenever i hear da same nagging routine frm ma dad, i tink ma ears bleed..... he always tells me that im nt gonna regret ma life now but later.... so i was wondering y is he nagging at me nw, wait till im an adult thn nag lahx....

k, now gotta go n cont ma damn sickening life!!!!!

aFTA centuRIES (nt really)

2008-11-24T13:43:00.000+08:00

well, feelin great 2 b bloggin again..... got a lot of things 2 update on.....

thurs-fri....

2days sleepover at ma kuzzie's sha2's ouz.... thurs was great... met her at LOT1 b4 heading baq 2 her ouz.... went 2 do her eyebrows n went 2 gt some shorts 4 me.... i realli dunno wat 2 wear 4 da BBQ.... kak naz is doin a BBQ 4 her berpday or a get 2 gether 4 her fwends... (im not realli sure.... till now) i jus knw tat im not sure wat 2 wear..... then i gt msg frm ma bestie NOORAISHA who told me 2 wear wat she bought me on ma las yr berpday..... i smiled.... jus 4 no reason.... then wen 2 order satay 4 da BBQ...... since it was in da nitetime n cold... sha2 n i decided 2 take a walk 2 da place with our choco fudge in our hands..... realli nice walk.... heard thousand n 1 sounds of nocturnal animals.... its da small ones.... then chat with kak naz n sha2 did a huge mistake..... read her blog 4 more dtailz......

then came da biggy day...... da BBQ.... tat i was waitin quite a while...... got up quite late..... bath n was crackin ma mind of wat shld i wear.... now here comes da series of troublez tat sha2 n i encouter.... ferstly her door keys...... we could'nt find any..... called her mom n gt scolded like hell...... then we locked all da room doors n gt out.... by then i was sweating like hell n ma make up was practically meltin off ma face..... then da genious sha2, said tat we shld walk 2 da shop 2 take da satays........ of coz i was reluctant.... da weather was realli super duper hot..... so we had a immature fight n we walked silently...... well of coz she broke da silence ferst.... afta collecting da satays, took bus 2 da chalet..... i seriously dunno hw many zillion times we called kak moi n kak naz 4 directions 2 chalet.....

sha2 n i walked like damn idiots..... we lost our ways...... addind 2 our misery were da slight downpour n ma satay 'kuah' plastic were about 2 snap..... we were HUNGRY, WET, MISERABLE, LOST N HORRIBLE..... we were 2 find an underpass, so we walked n walked n walked n WALKED 2 da NEVER REACHIN DESTINATION!!!!!!! finally we reached 2 underpass..... 2 think we have reached da destination, ABSOLUTELY WRONG!!!!! we still have'nt find da pit.... so again we walked.... atlast we gave up n sat dwn, tired, then kak moi saw us..... at tat moment was so nice 4 us, coz our hero has finally come 2 rescue us.... ( well, heroin).... a pretty one....... ATLAST we reached da chalet..... gave da satays n washed ma face..... was so darn tired.... n we realli had no mood.... coz of the keys problmz n sha2 mom.... we realli thought of goin HOME.... i tink im da most horrible person dwn there.... with ma face n hair like shit..... i realli dunno wat 2 say 4 maself..... kak moi n kak naz were so kind 2 give us food n we rest our bums on the staircase way......

most of da time lookin at kak moi n kak naz fwends.... they were so SLIM N PRETTY UNLIKE ME!!!! envying them....... thn sha2 n i realli enjoyed urselves...... kak naz n kak moi fwends were so warm.... realli appreciated tat..... plus there were some great songz..... i was so hyper n wanted 2 dance but i controlled maself.... but i could'nt helped much so i started grooving on the stairs 4 ma only audience. sha2...... then nawas joined us..... he's our kuzzie btw.... then gotta call ma dad..... well, wat else would he doo but SCOLDED ME IN DA PHONE.... well it was partially ma fault coz i didnt tell him bout da BBQ.... n thn he slammed da phone afta tellin me, 'kau jage..... balik kau kene'....... tat was scary.... thn wen baq hme with sha2's mom n mami fida (sha2's mom's fwend)....... wen baq 2 sha2's ouz.... coz it was realli late 4 me 2 go hme......

sat- caci's nikah......

wore sha2's punjabi n went 2 da nikah..... caci look nice.... lurve her lashes..... a lot of ppl.... 'salam' ma dad onli 2 gt 'da look'..... it sent shivers dwn ma spine...... it was worst thn watchin horror films..... but afta that everything went well.... gt hme afta taking shameer at his grandma'a ouz..... she was lookin so sick..... i realli pitied her..... eventhough she was ma step-mum's mother, she was realli nice n warm to ma bro n me over da yrz.... nite time, ma, ma bro n ma maid, ratna, gossiped bout da groom n ma step-mom..... heard some scary ghost stories frm ma bro, DANIYAL..... sunday, did nothin coz still tired.... jus slack at hme n watched TV..... 2day have 2 bro-sit ma bro, YASSIN..... so leceh siak....

wow!!!! this is realli a long post....... k, gotta go prepare lunch 4 da fatty bro of mine...
ADIOS SAMIYOS.......

sTill iN ShocK!!!!

2008-11-18T12:13:00.000+08:00

well harlo evry1....

its been 3 freakin days since i update ma blog..... So here it is........ i -pretty much did nothin exciting except 4 watch TV N cleAning da ouz... i jus finished eating cake which ma step-mom brought frm YASSIN's berfday Ys'day..... was really nice..... chocolate, of course it will b damn nice.....

now jus surfin da net n blogging...... listening to JENNIFER HUDSON'S SPOTLIGHT....... i dunt think she dunt realli need it rite now afta da tragic incident tat happened 2 her..... Pity her... i knw wat's it like 2 lose sume1 realli close 2 ur heart.... watched DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Ys'day.... da episode was realli nice n it thought me somethin; LIFE IS NOT MEANT 2 B TAKEN 4-GRANTED..... APPRECIATE DA SMALLEST THING IN LIFE..... tats soooooo not somethin i do in ma life..... haiz...... im really desperate 4 a job....... coz ferst im thirsty 4 $$$..... n also im damn bored at hme...... i need 2 go gym tooo..... i cant wait 4 da BBQ on this fri.... n on da nxt day i nd 2 attend ma youngest aunt marriage....(well not realli) N OF COZ IM SOOOOO EXCITED BOUT DA SLEEPOVER......

Ys'day got a book frm ma dad.... he asked me 2 read it coz its gonna b realli useful 4 me in life.... i was like; me readin????? whu r u kidding???? (well, i said tat in ma heart)..... jus flippin da book makes me nauseous....... da book's tittle is: JANGAN BERSEDIH..... me????? jgn bersedih???? hw can i not b sedih???? ma life is tragic n complicated.... so many things in life makes me sad.....

talkin bout bein sad, till now i CANNOT digest da news....... im still in shock... but not realli sad.... im happy on 1 side n worried on the otha side..... i cant realli tell da news coz many ppl r stiil in da dark bout it.....

I guess till here onli.... i'll update again soon..... ADIOS...... SAMIYOS.......

grADUATion day!!! BOO HOO HOO!!!!

2008-11-14T19:06:00.000+08:00

wow, 2day damn sad..... ferst woke up early morning 2 go 4 graduation day in QTSS......

one side of me was damn sad coz leaving fwendz, n teachers n of coz some places n food in skool like da mee soto in stall 2.... me n ma best fwend( NOORAISHA)..... planning 2 go baq 2 skool jus 4 da mee soto.... WAH!!!! nite time cannot sleep due to ma head.... remember i fall???? reach skool den do stoopid rehearsals...... dat was like damn lame..... i guess it was countless on hw many timez we stand up n go 2 a new seat..... all thnx 2 da damn 'BOTAK' nye cikgu..... then speech, speech n more speech frm 'SIBUK, TK GUNE NYE OMG!!!!'...... wen glad tats over, den it was concert.... tot it will b betta but it suckz too but not soo much lahx..... have 2 give credits to those who performs.... i dunt wanna mention names ah.... den receive da wadevea shit thel call tat thing... (leaving cert, testi or dunno wat lahx)..... 2 think ma teac cry.... but i cant blame her....

(nasib baik aku tk nangis, kalau tk malu sak)

but i felt like crying tooo coz tat teac(MDM HARYATI) watch me grow in ma yrs in QTSS..... frm ma hme-econ to ma form teac.... HAIZ!!!! im GONNA MISS HER even tough she sux in teachin well not tat much lahx but 'BORING SAK KALAU DIER AJAR'........ then got otha teac like ma eng teac whom im gonna miss;'NOT'...... then afta all tat sntimental moments..... its time 4 mkn.... n da mkn was like hhhhoooorrriiibbbllleeee.......... 'BERAK2 GUA'.... thn i saw all ma crushes 'shiok2' taking photos..... but they dunt wanna take with me....... thn 'ade udak2 merepek meraban yg main ngan mkn n air' atlast gt scoldin with teac..... hahahahaha..... thn i saw ma otha crush who is damn old in da GO.... 'mate dier like damn belolok'!!!! he looked at me.... yeah 4 me!!!!! thn aisha n i called out 4 a guy wich we knw, 'tapik si babi tu tk layan kite owg'..... 'kecian kite'.....

k lahx, tat was it in skool 4 graduation day tat sucks big time...... gonna miss aisha n her laughter, laughin at guys madly.... jia wei n her dimplez..... annie n her different language tongue.... line da shawty got loose..... ija da PT!!!! KH da rubbish..... Chevy da blusher.... Stacey da juling...... Erwin da uban... n othaz whu like to call me 'BESAR'!!!! Mikhail da 'tk blh habiz2 tersengeh je'.... YS da 'ketiak berbulu' CS da 'bacin'.... n da rest.....

then i cooked at hme 4 ma idiotic n asshole bro...... he still can say i tat da food i cooked were bought...... so dumbass... well tats wat he is..... 2 think im badmouthin bout him n he is sitting rite bside me...... da food turned out great coz da special ingredient was ma 'sweat'.... hee...hee.....heee...... oh n ya a VERY VERY HUGE BIG THNX TO MA BEST KUZZIE, SHARENA BEGUM BTE MOHD ARIFF ABDULLAH.......

k peepz, adios samiyos!!!!!

bad fall n havent regain yet.....

2008-11-13T13:02:00.000+08:00

what do i say bout maself???? clumsy???? or jus plain stupid???? Ys'day was da far most 'malu' day of ma life..... to think i fall head ferst on the grnd... n its not some 'ulu' place, its at plaza s'pura (well nearby there).... its the most painful fall i've had in ma life..... well it was raining heavily, n i was damn late 4 HSM3 tat i was suppose 2 catch with ma kuzzies.... jus as i was bout to dash 2 da traffic lite, I FALL..... i bang ma head on the cement pavement..... n to top it all off, there were ppl watching.... AIYOH!!!!! MALU LIKE HELL!!! luckily there were some kind souls who offered help.... GOD BLESS THEM!!!! n till now ma head hurts.... i cant even sleep properly las nite.... HAIX!!!! but i still manage to smile at tat guy whu helped me n catch da movie.... then inside tears drop one by one..... so MALU sak.... coz da pain was jus unbearable..... HSM3 was great.... i lurve corbin.... but i saw he's hairstyle lain a bit, but he is still cute.... i rate it 7 n 1/2 star over ten.... da storyline was quite dull but da sngz was damn nice n so was da choreography.... HATS OFF 2 THEM!!!! then wen 2 play game at arcade with sha2.... da game was awesome... GEREK SAK.... then chill2 outside while washing eyes on guys with ma sha2, kak moi n kak naz.... kak moi look so pretty n demure with wat she wore ys'day.... well tat was pretty much of wat i did ys'day n ya i gt told off by ma father, well he told me this (JANGAN HAYAL)..... its da same old thing but i also got a free 'urut' frm ma father... well tats is ys'day n YA DID I MENTIONED MA BRO LAUGHED HE'S ASS OF COZ I FALL!!!! TNX MUCH AH EH!!!! 2day got up, n now blogging.....